Boy Toy

I know you've got someone

living in there with you.

I'll be by at 12:30

to collect my extra money.

Your landlord.

Mm.

Jake, Jake.

Get up. Wake up.

I just got a message from Stu.

He knows you've been staying here.

You gotta go. He's on his way over.

Come on, let's go. Get up.

- Good morning.

- Hi. Good morning.

God damn it.

You see what you've done?

You're tearing my life apart, Jake.

There's someone

at the door.

Don't move.

Stay. Stay.

Hey, Stu.

You want some breakfast?

How are you doing? You hungry?

Oh, I'd love some lunch.

You know what?

I would like

a side order of green.

That would be

two bills extra a month.

And I need $1000 back rent,

or you two...

- There's only one.

- Baloney there's only one!

L... he... no one...

What's this?

Ha, look at that.

Hi. How are you?

Nice nipples.

Hey, Stu,

how are you?

"Hey, Stu,

what's happening," huh?

Is that cool?

Are you cool?

- He just spent the night, Stu.

- You know what? Don't.

He's hanging out

for a few days.

Crashing for a couple days? Don't.

Don't. Just don't play me for an idiot.

- No one's calling you an idiot.

- We all know how intelligent you are.

Don't play stupid with me,

'cause Mrs. Klein already ratted you out.

So I want the two of you...

pay up or get out!

I'm sorry, boys.

He... he asked me questions.

I'm disappointed, Mrs. Klein,

very disappointed.

It's okay, Mrs. Klein.

Listen, you just keep those

Social Security checks coming

and I'll be in

to rub your corns.

That's disgusting.

That's disgusting?

I'll tell you what's disgusting.

The two of you men

in a one-bedroom house.

The two of you men

doing stuff to each other.

- This is disgusting.

- I don't think that's...

Oh yeah? That's funny,

'cause you reek like his jizz.

Is that how it works?

Oh, you know,

it's innocent at first,

isn't it?

"Oh, I gotta take a shower.

Let's save water. It's Tuesday.

Why don't you jump in with me?"

I want two extra bills

and $1000 back rent,

or Fag City is gonna be

closed down

by Mayor McCheese

over here.

Good day!

Pay up!

Jake, you gotta

come up with $1200

by tomorrow morning!

Don't worry about it.

I'll take care of it, man.

Jake, you haven't got

a paycheck in six months.

How are you gonna come up

with $1200 tomorrow morning, Jake?

Okay, I'm expecting a residual check

any day now from the underwear ad.

Jake, the last time you got

a residual check for that,

it was $20.

And you spent it on a

"MILF Monthly" subscription.

Yes, that wasn't a very

good investment, huh?

Yes, Jake,

that's a bad investment.

That is a very very

bad investment.

What are you trying

to say, Ron?

I'm trying to say get a job.

Okay? Get a job, Jake.

All you do is

bring home hot women

and sleep with them

in my bed.

And I have to sleep

on the couch in my own house.

You don't pay for rent.

You don't pay for groceries.

- You don't do anything. And I'm sick of it.

- Okay.

I can't live like this anymore.

I just can't afford it anymore.

I refuse to afford it.

I can't afford it.

I can't support you.

Ronald, calm down. Things aren't

that easy for me either, okay?

It's not like I'm on vacation. I'm out there

every day trying to make a living.

Things are gonna

change, okay?

I'm trying really hard.

I'm gonna make this work.

I'm gonna get the cash to you,

I swear to God. I swear.

I've got a casting in a couple of hours.

It's for this modeling gig.

I think I've got

a good shot at it, man.

I've got one of those really good feelings

I usually get...

a really good feeling.

Don't worry about it.

Well, that's wonderful.

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