Birthday Girl

Synopsis: Internet love connections and mail-order brides rarely ever work out, and John should have known. Having never been lucky in the game of love and tired of waiting for the perfect woman to come along, John decides to take his chances and orders a mail-order bride from Russia online. At first, things seem perfect: his new bride Nadia is a gorgeous woman, and although she may not speak much English, her skills in the bedroom more than make up for any communication problems. When Nadia's 'cousins' unexpectedly arrive to celebrate her birthday, John is drawn into their web of corruption and crime.
Director(s): Jez Butterworth
Production: Miramax Films
  1 win.
Rotten Tomatoes:
93 min



Running, reading...

going out, staying in...

the countryside...

films... if they're good.

Intelligent, of course.


pretty, I suppose.

But it's not critical.

Someone you can really

talk to.

I think communication

is key.

The most beautiful girl

in the world

Picks my ties out

she eats my candy

She drinks my brandy

The most beautiful girl

in the wo-o-rld...

I came from Moscow,

and, um... I'm looking for

perfect husband.

...Older than me,

about 5 years.

Hello. My name is Tanya.

I don't want anything fat.

I don't like stingy man. Johnny Depp.

He's got passion.

He's good-looking.

...Who care about family,

who loves children.

I like friends.

I do wild things.

I'm actually looking for

somebody who could control that.

I like "Earth, Wind, and Fire,"

my favorite group.

...To the one and only

beautiful girl in the world


when you think about it,

England is just a small island.

I mean, I know that gives you about

20 million girls to choose from.

But if you live in a small town

and you work long hours,

you're just not gonna get

the chance to meet them all.

But I suppose I never

really believed in that stuff

about falling in love

with the girl next-door.

I mean, for a start,

I never had a girl next-door.

But where does it say

that you have to meet

the love of your life

in the local supermarket?

We all have someone

in our past...

one skeleton, if you like.

We've all got at least one person,

as it were, under the patio.

Not literally, of course.

I should say that some people,

on the face of it,

might not understand

what I'm doing.

They might think

it was a bit sad.

I think it's

quite a brave move.

Quite a brave...

reasonable thing to do.

Attention please. Flight

236 from Moscow has now landed,

and passengers are disembarking

at Gate 7.

This is

a security announcement.

Would all passengers ensure

that they keep their luggage

with them at all times.

Unattended baggage

will cause a security alert.

Flight 179 from Rome

has now landed...


I'm... I'm John.


Is that everything?


It's about 40 miles

from here.

Don't know if you've had

a chance to look at the map.

Close to London,

but it's a city in itself.

I'm having a problem

with ants.

It's the warmer weather.

I can't seem to find

the nest.

Do, um...

this is strange, isn't it?


I mean ants, you know? I'm

having a problem with ants.


It looks like

it might rain.

So, you're a smoker.

I thought you were

a nonsmoker.

Sorry. Do you understand

what I'm saying?

- Yes.

- Good. Good.

- Or should I speak slower?

- Yes.

Do you... Do you follow

or should I speak slower?


Um... are you a giraffe?


Oh, Jesus.

Jesus Christ!

This is John Buckingham

from St. Albans.

I need to speak to you

absolutely urgently.

There's been a mistake.

She doesn't speak English.

Repeat... she does not

speak English.

Please call me back

as soon as possible.

It's critical.


Your letters

were in English.

Good English. You said

you'd studied English.

Whoa... um...

That's for you.

I can't take that.

I can't take that.

I'm... I'm not really

a ring guy.



That's no big deal.

Yep. Thank you.


John Buckingham again.

If anyone's there,

could they please call me back

as soon as possible?

It's an emergency.

Repeat... emergency.

Man on TV:

Absolutely right.

Percival Lowell, who predicted

the existence of the planet Pluto,

was a champion of the theory

that intelligent life

once existed on which planet

of the solar system?


- Mars.

- Correct.

That number again...

St. Albans. 0724935.

I'll be here all night.

And if you get this message,

if anyone gets this message...

You should go now.

We'll... We'll talk

in the morning.


Ohh! Ohh!


Ohh! Ohh! Ohh!

This is Mr. Buckingham again.

It's now Monday

at 7:
15... 7: 16 a. m.

It is now imperative

that you call me back

as soon as you receive

this message. Thank you.

Woman on recording: You have

reached "From Russia With Love. "

If you are interested

in any of our services,

please leave us

a message...


this isn't gonna work.

I'm sorry.

I'm booking a flight

for you... today.

I'm sorry.

"John Buckingham, deputy head

of new business, yearly report.

"John listens

and comprehends well.

"When communicating, he selects

the most efficient methods

"and displays effective

verbal-communication skills

in dealing with both

customers and colleagues. "

Could you cash this,


So, John, did you have

a good weekend?

Uh, yeah, pretty good.

Do anything special?


Do you want it

in 10s?

"In January, John narrowly

missed promotion

"to head of new business

at the branch,

"but was rewarded in March

"when he became a trusted

holder of the keys to the vault.

"This was to mark 10 years

on-the-floor service.

"Customer relations...

although John

"is sometimes reticent

in engaging with customers,

"on one occasion,

"John showed first-class

communication skills

"in a delicate

customer situation.

"Problem solving...

"John identifies most problems

within appropriate time frames.

"He usually resolves

or minimizes most problems

"before they grow

into larger problems.

"As a local boy,

"John is a recognizable face

to customers,

"and so a valuable tool

"in maintaining

lasting relationships,

"although John still has some

reluctance to... or has problems in...

"carving out new relationships

face to face.


"John makes able decisions

in most areas of his job.

"John follows instructions


"and responds well

to personal directions...

"and in most situations,

assumes responsibility

"for his own actions

and outcomes.

"On the whole, John grasps the central

principles of banking for the new century.

"He understands

and responds to

"the power structure

on the floor.

"In conclusion, John should be

satisfied with his performance.

"This has been a sound,

workmanlike year for him...

...much the same as last year. "

Thank you.

I think that's very fair.





Good. Good. Very good.

So, how did that feel?


It feels...

It felt good. Weird.

It's called

"Trust... And... Letting Go. "

Trust... And...

Letting Go.

Made you a cup of tea.

Are you okay?




Today... bahd-day.


I- I don't understand.


- Today.

- Today.

Happy birthday!

Happy birthday!

- Birth-day.

- Yes. Happy birthday.


- Yes! Party. Party.

- Par-ty!



Yes. Party, party.

Happy birthday

to you

Happy birthday

to you

Happy birthday,

dear Nadia


Let me get it.

I'm sorry I'm late.

I told you I'd make it.

I told you she was beautiful.


Hey, John!

John, John, John, my man!

Hey, let me look

at you.

Oh, beautiful, beautiful.


One... One minute.

Nadia, meet my new guitarist,

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Tom Butterworth

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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