Bachelor Party

Synopsis: Bachelor Party is a 1984 comedy film directed by Neal Israel, written by Israel and Pat Proft, and starring Tom Hanks, Adrian Zmed, William Tepper and Tawny Kitaen. The film chronicles a bachelor party being thrown by a group of friends for their friend Rick Gassko (Hanks) on the eve of his wedding and whether or not he can resist the temptation of being unfaithful to his fiancée Debbie (Kitaen).
Genre: Comedy
Production: Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment
 
IMDB:
6.3
Metacritic:
56
Rotten Tomatoes:
54%
R
Year:
1984
105 min
888 Views


FADE IN:

EXT. ST. ANN'S SCHOOL - DAY

CAMERA PANS a group of freshly-scrubbed, innocent children,

obediently standing in line, like recruits for the Holy

Crusade. PULL BACK to REVEAL they are wearing the gray

blazers, striped ties and navy slacks of St. Luke's School.

They are waiting patiently at the curbside in front of the

statue of the school's sainted namesake. One of the fifth

grade BOYS pokes the KID next to him with his elbow. The

other Kid is about to retaliate when SISTER MARY FRANCIS, a

stern-faced nun, appears behind them, grabbing them both

firmly by the shoulders.

SISTER MARY FRACIS

Make one more move and you'll both

be staying late for the rest of the

week.

THE BOYS:

(softly; in unison)

Sorry, Sister Mary Francis.

SISTER MARY FRANCIS

I didn't hear you.

THE BOYS:

(louder)

Sorry, Sister Mary Francis.

Sister Mary Francis checks her watch. She scowls and looks

out past the parking lot gate.

Suddenly we HEAR the SOUND of an ENGINE roaring at full

throttle. There is a SCREECHING of BRAKES, followed by the

loud GRINDING of GEARS. It sounds like the Indy 500 is taking

place around the corner.

SISTER MARY FRANCIS

(used to this)

Step away from the curb, children.

ANOTHER ANGLE:

Zooming through the parking lot gates is a large yellow school

bus. It practically takes the last turn on just two wheels.

The bus driver quickly slams on the brakes, leaving ten feet

of rubber behind him as the bus comes to an ear-splitting

halt right in front of them. The front door immediately swings

open and RICK STAHL, the driver, hops out. Rick is the life

of the party, even when there isn't any party going on.

While chronologically older than the St. Luke students, the

only thing that sets him apart from them is that he has a

driver's license. Rick figures he'll live up to his

capabilities and get serious in his next life... This

incarnation's strictly for laughs. Sister Mary Francis steps

up to him.

SISTER MARY FRANCIS

You're late again, Rick.

RICK:

I know, Sister, but I have a very

good excuse.

SISTER MARY FRANCIS

There can be no excuse for tardiness.

RICK:

You're absolutely right. I should

never have stopped to save that

drowning infant. I'm just weak,

Sister; I'm so weak.

He starts sobbing softly into his hands.

SISTER MARY FRANCIS

All right, stop that... Children, on

the bus.

The kids obediently file past Rick, who makes like he is

drying his tears with his handkerchief.

RICK:

Sister, do you ever get lonely after

vespers? If you do, why don't you

give me a call. I'm in the book.

SISTER MARY FRANCIS

(smiling despite

herself)

Get going, Rick... you're late enough

as it is.

RICK:

Right... Think it over.

He hops on the bus, closes the door and gently backs the bus

out of the parking lot.

INT. BUS - DAY

As soon as the bus is out of sight of the school, all hell

breaks loose. The formally well-mannered children are acting

like normal kids... hitting each other over the heads with

books, running up and down the aisles, screaming at the top

of their lungs.

ANGLE - RICK

He removes the St. Christopher statue from the dashboard,

revealing a hulaing Hawaiian girl in a grass skirt. He watches

the madness behind him in his rearview mirror, picks up the

P.A. microphone and rationally attempts to restore order.

RICK:

(over mike)

If you don't all calm down I'm gonna

drive this thing over a cliff.

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Neal Israel

Neal Israel is an American actor, screenwriter, film and television producer and director best known for his comedic work in the 1980s for films such as Police Academy, Real Genius, and Bachelor Party. more…

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Submitted by aviv on November 03, 2016

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