
At Middleton
1
I head east towards the city
And when the sun goes down
I'm heading home again
The city lights
have left me empty
They've replaced the stars
That used to shine so bright
But I will smile
And I'll keep you close
And when the sun breaks
In the morning...
It's a fanfare.
It's great... arrival music.
It's "Fanfare for a Son"...
a classic.
Dad, I caved on the shirt.
I'm not wearing the tie.
A young man in a tie
makes a statement.
What, that my father
dresses me in the morning?
Nobody wears ties to these things.
What?
Without the tie,
we're having the sex talk.
Oh, my God.
I need a six-letter word for llama.
- Llama?
- Yeah.
Vicua.
How could you possibly know that?
Give me another one.
Okay, um, feckless.
What's another word for feckless?
- Feckless?
- Yeah.
Honey, feckless is the other word.
Come on, it's nine letters.
It's getting cold
out on that big lake
And the water's painted blue
Don't let the skyline
fool you, baby...
- Mom.
- Yeah?
- You just missed the turn.
- No, I didn't.
You looked right at the sign that said
"Middleton Campus Not This Way."
I don't know what
you're talking about.
What is wrong with you?
You're gonna make me late.
It's pointless!
What's pointless?
The goddamn nine-letter
word for feckless.
Pointless.
Right?
Look, Con rad,
I know that Middleton
is not at the top of your list,
but just give it a chance.
Sometimes a place can surprise you.
I'm surprised no
one's wearing a tie.
Can't you just park head in, like most
every other driver on the planet?
I've told you before,
you have much better visibility
when you're exiting
a parking space...
Dad, you just got parked.
Hi. Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Excuse me. Hi. Good morning.
- Hi.
- Good morning.
Uh, you took my spot.
I thought you were
pulling into that one.
No, I was gonna back...
you know, I was going to go like...
and then come in and back
into this one like that.
Ah, you're one of those.
- What does that mean?
- Look, it's a parking lot.
There's a space. Celebrate.
Celebrate?
Of course a guy who wears a bow tie
would back into a parking space.
Morn, just let it go.
Celebrate.
I bet you he irons his underwear.
I bet you he waits 30 minutes
You know fuming is feckless, right?
Yeah, and I bet you he made
his boy wear that tie.
Oh, my God, let's go!
X5 with 40-inch wheels
because we all know how treacherous
She had Colorado plates.
Yeah, well, God save the grizzlies.
All right, hey, everybody.
- Gather round.
- Here we go.
Hope everybody had a good
drive in, 10:
00 tour.Okay, welcome to Meet Middleton!
First, let's meet Justin. Hi.
That's me. I'm Justin.
Great to meet you guys.
- Hi, Justin.
- I'll be taking you around today.
Let's just pass
these bad boys out...
a little brochure, a map of the campus,
know where we're going.
- Thank you.
- Okay, cool.
I'm a junior at the college
music and horticulture...
unfortunately known
as a dingleberry.
Thank you.
Um, we're gonna take
a two-hour tour,
after which we'll break for lunch.
And then we're gonna have
You're gonna meet
the faculty member
from the department of your choice.
And by the time the
afternoon bell sounds...
you'll have fallen in love.
I guarantee it.
Well, all right, so let's get
this little tour bus on the road,
you rock stars.
Come on! Let's get going.
- They have a planetarium.
- It's an observatory.
- It's an observatory, chief.
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"At Middleton" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 26 Feb. 2021. <https://www.scripts.com/script/at_middleton_3208>.