
A Guy Thing
All right, guys. Quiet down.
Kill it.
All right,|I'd like to propose a toast.
To the three rings of marriage.
There's the engagement ring.
There's the wedding ring.
And there's suffering!
To Paul!
Thank you.
Drink! Drink! Drink!
Come on, man.|Loosen up a little.
I'm the uptight lawyer...
but you were always|the crazy one in the family.
- I know.|- Relax and have fun.
My bachelor party...
was the last good time|in my marriage.
Maybe your marriage|didn't work...
because you had too much fun|at the bachelor party.
It didn't work because Deena|was impossible to please.
Your marriage will be fine.|You've got Karen.
And she's beautiful.|Smart. Funny.
She's kind to animals.
She's very, very sexy.
She's got|a great sense of style.
- Pete.|- Yeah?
I'm just a big fan.
I can't believe my little|brother's getting married.
I got to run. I love you.
OK. Hey!
You are a lucky, lucky man.
Paul, up high!
Good luck in there.|Congratulations.
Thanks.
Listen, Jim, about the girls...
I'm not sure.
- I totally understand, dude.|- You do?
- Absolutely.|- Good.
And I want you|to know something, man.
I don't give a shit.
- You be the groom.|- That's not how it works.
Hang on a second.|I'm giving you a chance...
to be the groom|at a bachelor party...
and you don't have|to get married next Saturday.
Think about that.
Listen up, everybody.
As of this moment,|I am the groom.
We got tiki girls!
Where's the groom?
Sorry.
You really suck at this.
Yeah. It's my first day.
Would you buy me a beer?
Yeah.
Jimmy.
- Hello?|- Hi, Paul.
Hi, Mrs. Cooper.
I'm going to be|your mother-in-law.
Call me Sandra.
- Hi, Sandra.|- How was the bachelor party?
You know, silly.
It's really|such an outdated ritual.
You are|every mother-in-law's dream.
Can you put Karen on for me?
Sure. Hold on.
Oh, my God.
What is it?|Is something the matter?
I guess Karen|hasn't arrived yet.
What do you mean?
She's on her way over.|She should be there by now.
Nope. Not here yet.
Sandra, I have to get going.
Could you please have her...
Holy shit.
Miss? Ma'am?
- Hey.|- You have to leave now.
Good morning to you, too.
I'm not a rude guy,|but you have to go now!
OK, I'm going.
My fiancee|is on her way over here.
You're getting married?
Only if you leave|really, really soon.
You weren't the guy|with the groom hat on.
I'd love to explain,|but you have to leave.
I'm going|to get my ass kicked.
That is very clear.
What happened?
OK, let's go.
Bad news.|I can't find my underwear.
Can I mail them to you?
Yes, please.|They're my only pair.
Give me your address.
I have more than|one pair of underwear.
I'll find them|before she gets here.
Calm down.|If you're freaking out...
when your fiancee gets here,|you'll freak her out.
You're freaking me out,|and I don't even know you.
Just be cool.
I'm a very cool guy.
Cooler than most of the guys|you probably meet.
No offense. This is just|a bad situation for me.
Trust me. I'm not this guy.
After you.
If you see a pair of|bikini underwear lying around...
see this guy.
Could you not say that, please?
Can you do me a favor|and take the back stairs?
In case I had any speck|of self-esteem left?
I bet that goes over well|with the ladies.
There are no ladies,|all right?
- Right.|- It's actually...
Thank you, Mrs. Jackson.
Aloha.
Wedding planner.
We were thinking of going|with the whole luau thing.
Good day.
Shit!
Not there. God!
Shit.
Could you undo the chain?
One second!
Paul! What's going on?
Please undo the chain.|I am standing out here.
Paul, are you OK?
Karen, sweetheart,|what a surprise.
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Citation
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"A Guy Thing" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 24 Jan. 2021. <https://www.scripts.com/script/a_guy_thing_1922>.