Zootopia Page #4

Eventually BUNNIFER and JASON go to talk to the JAGUAR LIMO DRIVER (a LIMO DRIVER who is a JAGUAR, not the driver of a JAGUAR LIMO), but HE TOO has gone FERAL and tries to KILL THEM! They manage to RESTRAIN HIM and call in REINFORCEMENTS, but by the time IDRIS and the other COPS arrive, the DRIVER has disappeared.

CGI IDRIS ELBUFFALO

Bunnifer, you ass! Clearly this whole tale of a jaguar gone savage is the product of your malfunctioning bunny imagination!

CGI BUNNIFER GOODWIN

Well you could always go and see his smashed-up house if you want proof. It’s like two minute’s walk from here. The door’s open and everything.

CGI IDRIS ELBUFFALO

Enough of your nonsense! Your forty-eight hours are up, hand in your-

CGI JASON BATEFOX

Hold it! I’d like to point out that the thirty-eight hours she’s had so far is LESS than forty-eight, because of how numbers work.

CGI IDRIS ELBUFFALO

Curse you and your technicalities! Fine, I’ll give you the remaining ten hours. Plus like ten more, I guess, seeings it’s nighttime again by the time you actually solve the case.

CGI JASON BATEFOX

All right Bunnifer, I suggest we track what happened to that driver by using traffic cameras, which monitor every square foot of every street throughout all of Zootopia, even in deserted little backwaters like this one.

CGI BUNNIFER GOODWIN

Then how the hell was that picture from the otter’s file the “last known image” of him? Considering everything we wind up learning about the case, shouldn’t the cops have been able to track his every move from the get-go and solved this thing in under an hour?

CGI JASON BATEFOX

Luckily for you, it would seem not!

EXT. CREEPY ABANDONED HOSPITAL

BUNNIFER and JASON track the DRIVER to some LAB which is guarded by an army of WOLVES.

CGI BUNNIFER GOODWIN

Wolves? Right before he went nuts, the otter was heard ranting about "night howlers". Wolves howl at night! That's what he must have meant!

CGI JASON BATEFOX

Then why wasn't he ranting about, you know, "wolves"? That's the word most people use for wolves. If he'd been attacked by camels would he have been yelling about "desert walkers"? Seriously, it's a good thing this revelation turns out to be a red herring, because it's f***ing stupid.

They sneak into the LAB, where it turns out all the MISSING PREDATORS are being kept captive by MAYOR OF ZOOTOPIA J.K. LIONS.

Rate this script:2.8 / 17 votes