Zoolander 2 Page #3
Zoolander is in Rome?
Welcome to the palazzo d'caca.
The entire hotel
is biodegradable
and made from
reclaimed human waste.
This is the ultra-exclusive,
fully-toxic,
zero-footprint suite.
The masseuses at the spa
are all homeless.
And the hotel
has complimentary
farm-to-table Wi-Fi.
Wait...
We're rooming together?
Mmm-hmm.
There must be some mistake.
I'll call Billy Zane.
Good idea.
Look, tiny phone!
That is so retro.
I'm gonna take
a picture of it
with my phone.
This is Billy Zane.
I'm not here right...
Well, don atari
is waiting for you
down in the lobby.
Oh, and don't
drink the water
or you'll die.
I just have one question.
Yeah?
What in the world is
farm-to-table Wi-Fi?
You're asking me?
Muchacho, I have no idea.
For serious?
No!
Because when vip said that,
you had this look
on your face, like,
"i totally know
what farm-to-table Wi-Fi is!"
I was acting cool
'cause I thought you knew.
I thought you knew!
No, I just didn't want vip
to think I was uncool!
I miss not knowing things
with you.
Yeah. Me, too.
Why didn't
we do this sooner?
Because we've
both been in hiding
since the day
i killed my wife
and permanently
disfigured you.
Oh, yeah,
that's probably it.
That was the day
i lost the fire.
The fire?
The fire in my face.
It's kind of
You still got it, d-zone.
You're Derek zoolander.
You stopped a Chinese
throwing star in mid-air
with a look.
I was there.
That's not me anymore.
Yes, it is.
Hey, flash me
that beautiful look.
Give me that
incredible Magnum.
No!
Think fast. Magnum.
Wait, no!
Magnum! Now!
Oh!
Come on! You got this,
but you got to focus!
Come on!
Hansel, stop!
You have this! Yeah!
Maybe we could
try a wash cloth?
Tequila!
Hansel, no!
No! It's not working!
Ah, you're right.
What happened to us?
You mean me.
You still have it.
No, I don't.
Look at this face.
It's a horror show.
Come on, hansel.
It can't be that bad.
It is.
Take off your mask.
No.
No way.
No one's ever seen me
without this mask.
And no one ever will.
I think I know the real you.
And it has nothing to do
with the way you look.
You mean that?
Of course, I do.
Okay.
No!
It's disgusting!
Put it back!
I was wrong, please,
put the mask back on!
It's so gross!
I can't be friends with you
if you look like that! Please!
It is so disgusting!
Please, put it back!
Please, hansel, put it back,
i was wrong!
No. This feels good.
Could you please
put the mask back on
so I can concentrate on
what you're saying?
No! I'm done hiding.
Look, there's only one way
for us to find ourselves.
Know what that is?
Look inward and connect
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"Zoolander 2" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 28 Mar. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/zoolander_2_24045>.
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