Zoolander Page #2

Nobody! I gotta get inside.

I'm "shvitzing" like a "shmedrik"

with all these lights.

Are you worried about Hansel?

Not as much

as I'm worried about Gretel.

Hey, put that Hansel and Gretel

line in your article.

I want people to know

how funny I can be.

Oh, believe me, they'll know.

It hits newsstands tomorrow.

Excuse me, Mr. Mugatu.

Mr. Mugatu, Matilda Jeffries.

Time magazine.

Any comment on Prime Minister

Hassan's wage increases...

for Malaysian garment workers?

- No, he has no comment.

Let him speak for himself. Would you

like to see the prime minister...

out of power so you can continue

exploiting cheap Malaysian workers?

Hey, Mugatu! Screw you

and your little dog too!

Look out!

She's got an egg!

Oh, my God! Let go of me!

Yes!

Wow.

I just can't tell you how much

this means to me...

to be the first recipient

of this beautiful award.

We have a serious problem

on our hands, Maury.

This Malaysian thing

is getting out of hand.

I hear you,Jaco.

What this, the Slashie, mean...

is you consider me

the best actor slash model...

and not the otherway around.

His proposed wage increase

could ruin all of us.

I need it taken care of soon.

I have people to answer to.

Now to the important stuff.

These ain't no slashes, folks...

These are the pure breeds...

Here are the nominees

for Male Model of the Year...

Young, hot, brash...

With more covers in his first year

than any rookie model ever...

and an attitude that says,

"Wiho cares? It's only fashion..."

That Hansel's so hot ri ght now.

I hear a lot of words

like "beauty"and "handsomeness"...

and "incredibly chiseled features..."

To me, that's like a vanity,

a self-absorption...

that I try to steer clear of...

I dig the bungee... For me,

it'sjust the way I live my life...

I grip it and I rip it...

I live it with a lot offlair...

I live it on the edge,

where I gotta be...

I wasn 't like every other kid,

who dreams about being an astronaut...

I was always more interested in what

bark was made out of on a tree...

Richard Gere's

a real hero of mine... Sting...

Sting would be another person

who 's a hero...

The music that he's created...

I don 't really listen to it...

But the fact that he's making it,

I respect that...

I care desperately about what I do...

Do I know what

product I'm selling? No...

Do I know what I'm doing today? No...

But I'm here,

and I'm gonna give it my best shot...

Over the past decade...

male modeling has had a shadow

cast over it by one man...

and five syllables...

Der-ek Zoo-lan-der...

Modeling, to me, isn 't just

about being good-looking...

or having a lot of fun and

being really, really good-looking...

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