Zerophilia Page #4

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LUKE:

Oh. Bummer.

MICHELLE:

I'm considering a prosthetic foot.

She smiles.

They sip from their glasses and drink each other in.

Luke contemplates a kiss,...

but his breathing grows shallow, he GASPS.

MICHELLE (CONT'D)

What's the matter?

LUKE:

Nothin'. Maybe just kind a' hot

out here. You want moron? When my

dad died, -it's okay, I was nine.

I barely knew what was goin' on-

But I thought the tombstone was

really sad looking, so I painted

smiley faces and fish all over it.

MICHELLE:

That's sweet.

LUKE:

Yeah, I'm sure dad would've loved

that.

His face REDDENS. Overheated, Luke tugs at his shirt,

brushes SWEAT from his brow.

MICHELLE:

So, what do you think makes a good

relationship?

13.

LUKE:

For real? I don't know.

Friendship. Great sex. Knowing

you want to be there even when it

gets scary or bloody.

MICHELLE:

Whoa. Where'd that come from?

LUKE:

Sorry.

MICHELLE:

No, it's just not the usual guy

thing. ...You're great, you know?

Luke puts his hand on his chest, FEELS something.

He stands, puts on his jacket.

LUKE:

Will you excuse me a sec'?

NEAR THE KITCHEN

HYPER-VENTILATING, his arms CLUTCHING HIS CHEST,

BEADS OF SWEAT on his forehead,

Luke checks the Men's Room door: LOCKED.

He ducks out the service entrance.

EXT. PARKING LOT

By the dumpster, Luke reaches behind his head, WHIPS off his

jacket and shirt, and looks down...

His eyes GO WIDE.

LUKE:

-AAH!

On his chest:
FEMALE BREASTS.

Two WAITERS come outside for a smoke.

FIRST WAITER:

Table twenty-nine. Like to bring

her the cannoli special.

14.

Luke peers over the dumpster, down at his breasts, with a

HIGH FEVER, and PASSES OUT, slumping to the ground.

BEHIND THE DUMPSTER - LATE NIGHT

Luke's eyes open, dilated, disoriented. He's lying on the

ground, shirtless among bits of garbage.

He watches bleary-eyed, as a MOUSE peers at him from inside

an empty milk carton. The mouse runs over and sniffs at a

canteloupe, which triggers Luke's memory:

He GRABS his chest, relieved to find it's back to normal.

He stands, dizzy, surveying the dark, locked restaurant, and

staggers across the deserted parking lot toward his truck.

EXT. WOODED HIGHWAY - LATE NIGHT

Luke's Semi THUNDERS along.

INSIDE THE CAB:

Luke stares out in shock.

He hears HEAVY BREATHING, MOANS, VOICES.

FEMALE VOICE (O.S.)

Oh yes! Don't stop!

He looks around for the source of the sounds, glances over.

RIGHT SIDE VIEW MIRROR

in it's reflection a leering male, stripped to the waist.

MALE VOICE (O.S.)

Lie down for me, baby!

The HEAD LAMPS of an oncoming car FLASH at him.

As he glances out the driver-side window, MUSIC BLARES from

the passing car.

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