With This Ring

No.

This wedding...

...is stressing me out.

I'm happy for you, Elise.

William's a good guy.

But..

being a bride's maid

when you are a single woman.

It's as fun as those first few days

of a two tie weave...

...when you feel like you can hear

other people's thoughts.

Last night at the rehearsal dinner.

Hello.

- Hi.

You look beautiful.

- You too.

Where is Elise?

Oh. There she is.

She looks gorgeous.

Hey...

Trista.

When am I gonna get

an invite to your wedding?

They say women who wait too long...

...are more likely to get stroke

by lightning than to get a man.

Come on. Don't worry.

You'll find a man soon.

There's got to be somebody out here

that will marry you.

So...

when are you getting married?

Those ovaries ain't gonna

stay fresh forever.

Apparently I have a better chance

of being strike by lightning.

For the shriveling my dusty ass ovaries,

right after being rejected

by the last man on earth.

So don't hold your breath.

Too much?

Then, there's your ex-boyfriend.

Who is also a groomsman.

It should have been our wedding.

And the moment you realize...

...that the statistical 1 in 2 black women...

...who would never get married...

is you.

Wait.

Oh no.

Oh no.

You looked like a homeless person.

Listen.

You have to go.

You have to go.

Wait, wait, wait. One more thing.

I need to talk to you about something.

You need to...

Oh.

Listen. Tell me later at the wedding.

But, Trista, this is important.

- Oh fine. What?

Trista.

Come on.

No.

Hey.

Can you give me a minute?

Girl, let us in, will you?

- What's going on?

Oh.

Hey. Thank you for...

bringing that thing by.

'That thing?'

That's what they're calling it now huh?

Oh no.

That's what they always called it.

One drink, she said.

- Please don't start.

What did I say?

Nothing good would come from it.

Girl, I don't know why

you still look like that.

The wedding is in an hour.

Is it?

Oh...

Look. I'll go to the church

so Elise doesn't freak out.

Viv.

Try and do something with that.

It was an accident.

- It always is, girl.

I'm sorry.

I'm so ashamed...

- Come on. Let's just get you in the shower.

Oh...

god.

Don't look.

Don't look...

Hurry up, Trista.

Oh my gosh. I can't believe

you're stealing this stuff again.

I'm not stealing.

- You're so cheap.

So rude of you to say.

I'm helping you out.

You could at least give me a little liquor.

Do you think they do this

to married agents?

Or because I'm single.

They think I'm so pathetic

that I'm working on New Year's eve?

My most meaningful relationship

is with an electronic device.

Mine too...

...but it is not a phone.

Do you think that...

I don't know if there's even a

chance that maybe he and I...

No.

I mean that may...

- No....

Maybe our timing is just...

- No.

Well, it has been years.

I know how I sound.

But...

I'm tired of pretending that

I don't care if I meet the one.

Why it's okay to fight for your career.

But...

Ouch.

Marriage is some...

cosmic prize that you get...

...only after being completely

peaceful that, it will never happen.

So depressing.

How do you beat impossible odds

while pretending to not even to try?

Honey.

It's our hidden shame.

Yeah. On top of the outer shame that

no one wants to marry you.

You know what?

The outer shame.

You could get one of your clients

to write that script.

Amaya could be the lead.

Amaya.

Oh, whatever.

Hey. I'm calling to say thank you

for the ticket,

and the room,

and the clothes.

You don't know you bought that yet.

But it's not the same as if you were here.

And I understand why you can't be.

But...

Still...

I'm gonna need something very expensive

for this when I get back.

Bye.

Amaya.

Is she drunk?

You all were taking a long time

and she was really nervous.

You got her drunk?

She's about to get married.

Well, you all were late.

Hey, here. Drink this, baby.

Drink that.

Tris...

I'm scared.

It's like...

I'm handing my whole self

over to someone else.

And I like my whole self.

Do you remember when we were in college.

And, and we went to that Omega party?

The one where Viviane threw up

and it was so disgusting?

But then William walked in and you said...

One day, I'm going to marry him.

- Right.

That's what I said about that one twin from

Jagged Edge. You remember?

Today is that day.

Get me a mint.

I'm ready.

- You're almost, almost.

Okay.

Why don't you take this instead?

Take as many as you want.

Take another one.

Yeah.

You take 3.

Yeah.

I could, I could smell...

It's okay.

Yeah.

Ha-ha-ha.

There you go.

Oh.

Okay.

Mr and Mrs William Branford Johnson.

Congratulations.

And may your love continue

to inspire others...

...as it has inspired me.

And my fiancee.

It's your turn.

It's your turn.

Oh.

What's she doing?

How exactly do you see this playing out.

Did you think that you would just...

- One second.

Thank you.

I would also like to add that.

Trista is now a superstar Hollywood agent

And has an amazing loft with a hot car.

Thank you.

Sit down.

Thank you very much.

And uh...

...everybody please.

An applause for William and Elise.

I'm sure she's a perfectly nice person.

Her wean looks terrible.

I think it's real.

I'm sorry.

You think...

is that why he didn't meet me.

No, no.

- I know what would make you feel better.

Oh no.

No, no, no... Amaya.

It's my baby daddy.

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