Wet Hot American Summer

Synopsis: The setting is Camp Firewood, the year 1981. It's the last day before everyone goes back to the real world, but there's still a summer's worth of unfinished business to resolve. At the center of the action is camp director Beth, who struggles to keep order while she falls in love with the local astrophysics professor. He is busy trying to save the camp from a deadly piece of NASA's Skylab which is hurtling toward earth. All that, plus: a dangerous waterfall rescue, love triangles, misfits, cool kids, and talking vegetable cans. The questions will all be resolved, of course, at the big talent show at the end of the day.
Genre: Comedy, Romance
Director(s): David Wain
Production: USA Films
  1 nomination.
Rotten Tomatoes:
97 min

No, I couldn't possibly.

- It would be just...

- I said no!

Sorry. that was...

Oh, Coop. Look at Abby.

Oh, she wants to f*ck me.

So help me God.

She wants to f*ck me.

And this time, Victor, I'm sure it's true.

I have to admit. Abby Bernstein

is one of the only berry bushes...

that I have yet to pollinate,

if you get my meaning.

You mean, she's the only girl at camp

you haven't done it with yet?

That's exactly what I mean.

Hey, Gene. Any mashed potatoes?

Gary! Bring out the taters!

Here they are. Hey, Gary.

- Hey, dude, what's up?

- Hey, guys.

What'd you say, shithead?

I said, "hey, guys."

What's your glitz, Gene?

Listen to me, you fucked-up little

cigarette-smoking piece of shit.

I was in the Vietnam war.

- I know.

- Oh, yeah.

The 'Nam.

Excuse me, ladies. You

may remember me...

as the guy who came to dinner a few

weeks ago with underwear on my head.

My name is Keith Stack.

From Millburn, New Jersey.

State bird:
The Mosquito.

And as you may have heard,

I am recently...

a crowned class-b Dungeon Master.

So if any of you would like

to play "D & D" today,

please speak now or

forever hold your peace.


Alexa, maybe you'd like to join in?

We do need a druid, and

you have definitely cast...

a level-five charm spell on me.

In your dreams, douche bag.

Douche bags are hygienic products.

I take that as a compliment.

- Thank you.

- Ewww! Ewww!

Well, we made it to the end

of the summer in one piece,

Except for a few campers who are lepers.

Good one, Beth.

Thank you, Gene.

Excuse me. Could you tell me where

I could find the, uh...

How do I put this?

The, uh, sci-fi,

nerdy, indoor kids?

- Bunk 3.

- Oh, yeah. thanks.

Hey, guys.

I'm associate Professor Neumann.

Who'd like to spend the last day at camp

doing science projects?

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Michael Showalter

Michael Showalter (born June 17, 1970) is an American comedian, actor, director, writer and producer. He is a member of the sketch comedy trio Stella. Showalter first came to recognition as a cast member on MTV's The State, which aired from 1993 to 1995. He and David Wain created the Wet Hot American Summer franchise, with Showalter co-writing and starring in Wet Hot American Summer (2001), and the Netflix series. Showalter wrote and directed The Baxter (2005), in which he starred with Michelle Williams, Justin Theroux and Elizabeth Banks. Both of the films featured many of his co-stars from The State, and so do several of his other projects. Showalter is also a co-creator, co-producer, actor, and writer for the TV series Search Party. more…

All Michael Showalter scripts | Michael Showalter Scripts

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "Wet Hot American Summer" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2020. Web. 29 Nov. 2020. <https://www.scripts.com/script/wet_hot_american_summer_23253>.

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