Waltz with Bashir Page #4

I wondered why

they didn't notice me.

I peeked a few more times,

I realized that they probably thought

that everyone was killed in the attack.

I decided to wait until dark.

I had a good place to hide.

I don't know why, but I decided

to crawl out to the sea.

I didn't want to stay close to shore,

so I swam quite far out.

When I felt I was far out enough

I started swimming south.

How was the sea?

Really calm, no waves.

I felt calm and at peace.

Just me and the sea.

I felt safe, because the sea

was calm and peaceful.

But I was still really afraid

that my strength would fail

and I'd drown.

Or maybe someone might spot me

and shoot at me, kill me.

While swimming through

this peaceful water,

I suddenly heard a loud noise.

I felt the water pulsating.

I felt the turbulent water

enveloping me.

My body shook with fear.

I saw lights in the distance

and I headed in that direction.

They might be Israeli forces.

I kept swimming

but felt my strength was dwindling.

I could barely move my limbs.

Sometimes I simply

let the water carry me along.

I eventually reached shore

and started walking.

I heard voices speaking Hebrew

on the two-way radio.

I knew

that I had to get to them

despite my exhaustion.

To my amazement, it was

the regiment that had abandoned me.

After I got back to my regiment,

I felt like...

like it was me who had

abandoned my comrades.

I always felt

that they regarded me like...

like someone who didn't help

rescue his friends.

As if I had fled the battlefield

just to save my own skin.

I sometimes felt very uneasy.

I broke off contact

with the families of the dead.

At first I visited their graves,

but then I just stopped.

I wanted to forget.

I didn't want to relive those moments.

Visiting the graves, you felt...

- Guilty.

I felt guilty standing at their graves.

As if I didn't do enough.

I didn't do enough.

I wasn't the hero type who carries

weapons and saves everyone's life.

That's not me. I'm not the type.

I bombed Sidon today

amid the clouds of smoke at dawn

I almost went home in a coffin

I bombed Sidon today

One month after Ronnie Dayag

swam back home safely,

the army took the beach

from which he had fled.

They told us we'd soon attack Beirut

and that we'd all die.

But on the beach

we didn't think much about death.

I had a hut of banana leaves.

Thinking back,

the smell of Patchouli Oil

still makes me nauseous.

It was really popular in the '80s.

For my roommate Frenkel,

Patchouli was not just a fragrance,

it was a way of life.

Patchouli...

How do you use it?

Show me.

You sprinkle a drop on your hand,

like this.

This way,

your comrades always know you're there.

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