Waking Madison

If you're watching this right now,

it's because you've forgotten,

why you've locked yourself

in your apartment.

You've given yourself 30 days,

to figure out why you're so messed up.

Your phone's been turned off.

You don't have sh*t.

You don't have friends.

You don't have a job.

This is your last chance.

'Cause I swear to God,

if things don't change

in these next 30 days...

...I will kill myself.

# I don't need a laser beam #

# I don't need the time #

# Leave me in the car tonight #

# Rest your drunken mind #

# I need your grace #

# Alone #

Madison.

Madison, wake up.

Madison, can you hear me?

I'm Dr. Barnes.

Can I have some water?

Can you tell me your full name?

Madison Walker.

Do you know what month it is?

June?

July?

Have you ever been treated

for any type for of mental illness?

I take medication.

And what do you

take medication for?

I don't know.

You don't know

what you take medication for,

or you were never told

what the medication was for?

I don't understand the question.

When can I go home?

Are you having

any suicidal thoughts now?

No.

Can you tell me

what happened last night?

I don't remember.

Well, if you don't remember,

then how do you know that you

didn't try to take your life?

Because I know I wouldn't do that.

Have you ever spent any time

in a psychiatric hospital?

No.

Would you ever consider

checking yourself in to one?

No.

I have that book.

Excuse me?

I'm gonna give you my number,

and, uh, I want you to call me

if you need anything.

My mom burned them all.

Burned what?

My notebooks.

But I hid one so she couldn't find it.

Why did you hide that one

and not the others?

Because I needed you to find it.

Uh, I was sitting up front

in his station wagon,

and he had these, um,

red plastic seat covers.

It made a noise when he moved.

And there was, like, um, a plastic...

Jesus figurine on the dashboard.

Why were you alone

in the car with him?

Uh, well, it was like, um...

like a field trip to the... to the zoo,

and, uh... and the bus

was all filled up,

so, um, I rode with him in the car.

What happened... in the car?

It's okay. You can tell me.

It's okay.

Um...

He kissed me.

Did he try to...

touch you, or...

Why didn't you tell your parents

what happened?

Um...

I told my mom.

And what did she say?

Um... She didn't believe me.

How could she not believe you?

She said that, uh, a man of God

would never do something like that.

What do you mean, "a man of God"?

Um, he was our priest.

Okay, so, I guess

you just fell on that razor.

Uh-huh.

You know what your problem is?

You're too f***ing white.

You see, Black people...

we don't let sh*t get to us.

I mean, seriously,

that's why you don't see Black girls

up in the loony bin.

Because we don't let sh*t bother us.

We don't give a f***.

What are you waving at

with that tired-ass...

- I'm not interested.

- I'm not selling.

Glad we got that straight.

You know, tell me something,

beautiful.

I bet you like to get f***ed

really hard, hmm?

Tell Daddy what you like.

Uh, since when do you smoke?

What... what the hell

is your problem?

Hello?

Mm.

Where were we?

Put your hands around my throat.

What?

Oh.

Harder.

Yeah. Yeah, you like that?

Choke me.

Choke me. Choke me.

Please stop.

You like getting f***ed.

Please stop. Please.

I know what you want me to say.

What do you think

I want you to say?

That they took advantage of me

because I was only 13.

Well, do you think

they took advantage of you?

No.

They got you drunk with the intention

of having sex with you.

Look, they've been married

for, like, 100 years.

They needed something

to spice it up.

Did you have any feelings for...

either one of them?

I liked him better.

And where is he now?

He killed himself.

What do you want?

Your rent.

You're like a week late.

It's due on the 1st.

Today is the 9th, sweetheart.

I'll have it tomorrow.

No, you...

Tomorrow's too late, sweetheart.

Open the door.

Tomorrow's too late.

But, now, if you wanted

to do some trading

like we did back in March...

I'll work with you.

I don't know what you're talking about.

You have my money by tomorrow

morning or you're out of here.

Margaret,

we can't keep doing this.

I can.

Why do you want to?

'Cause.

'Cause why?

Because I'd rather slit my wrist

or be f***ing hung upside down

and beaten to a pulp

than have to talk to you.

You're angry.

No.

Don't start that psychological sh*t.

You really don't like me, do you?

Beth, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

It's not that...

that I don't like you.

I f***ing hate you.

Why?

"Why?" "Why?"

Because people that are scared

make me sick.

You think that I'm scared?

I don't know, Beth.

Are you scared?

Hmm? What happened to you?

Tell me.

You gonna say

any-f***ing-thing? No?

No, I can play that game, too.

Cool.

I'll go back to bed.

# Before each other's face #

# Look into my eyes #

# Is it still there? #

# All that time #

Maddie?

Hi, Dad.

A friend of yours, Greg Hicks,

got married last week.

Did you hear?

No.

Yeah.

They had the wedding

over at the Episcopal church

on, uh, Fitz Morris street.

Hurricane knocked down everything

on that street except that church.

Is everything all right with you?

Yeah, same as usual.

That's good. That's good.

You need money?

Dad, I didn't come here

to ask you for money.

Well, I know you didn't.

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