Valiant Page #2
Ha-ha!
Look at that. It's London!
Whoo-hoo!
All right, listen up.
This is easy,
for intelligent guys like you.
All you got to do,
keep your eyes on the pebble here.
She's shy. Give her a chance,
she will give you the slip.
Find her, and the crumbs is yours.
Easy as pie. I don't know
how I stay in business.
There it is, under that one.
Where is it now?
[humming] Find her
and the crumbs is yours.
Which one is it under?
- That one.
- That one?
Oh, no. Bad luck again.
Gonna give it one more go?
Law of averages.
I think you're gonna win this time.
[laughing]
Tell us, then, which one
has the pebble?
Well, in all the excitement,
I forgot myself.
What do you gents say
to a game of, uh, football?
You big cheat!
Give me my crumbs back.
On the level.
I know what you're thinking.
Come and get me, falcons.
[whooping]
Oh!
- Strike me down if I tell a lie.
- [Valiant] Whoa!
- Oh.
- [groaning]
[chuckling] Look.
That was lucky.
Prayers were answered.
- Hello, mate!
- I lost control.
You could not have
picked a better time.
- Beg your pardon.
- Bugsy's the name.
I'm terribly sorry.
I'm Valiant.
So, what brings you to my manor?
Oh, l... Well,
I've come to be an aviator.
With the Royal
Homing Pigeon Service.
- Fighting for king and country.
- You don't say?
I've never been
a hope-and-glory bird myself.
I'm rather partial to something
called "freedom."
Yeah, I flit about as I please.
No one telling me what to do
or when to do it.
Are they...
Are those flies?
Oh, them. [laughing]
They're friends of mine.
[coughing and groaning]
So, RHPS is recruiting?
Good idea. Right this way, mate.
I'm feeling rather patriotic myself
all of a sudden.
- There he is!
- Come on. After him!
Oi! Let's get going.
Come on. [whistling]
He's here somewhere.
I can smell him.
Follow my lead, mate.
Hello. Two to enlist, please.
Valiant Pigeon,
reporting for duty, sir.
- Valiant Pigeon, yeah.
The Valiant Pigeon.
You don't have Valiant on your list?
- No.
- Whoo-hoo-hoo.
- Clerical error.
- Should I have?
Look at him.
He's a perfect specimen.
Do something.
He's fast as lightning,
strong as an ox.
Very tall for his height.
Stand up there. Sit down.
Yeah... Oh, the bird's
a legend in the Struppen...
Too small.
You should be "yea high,"
and you're not even "hey high."
That's charming, that is.
And you! [sniffing] Phooey!
Have you by any chance
heard of a birdbath?
Sad truth is,
I've got me a rare
feather condition, yeah.
Can't go near a bath.
I look at a bath, and it makes me itch.
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"Valiant" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 25 Apr. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/valiant_22695>.
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