Trainwreck Page #4

NIKKI:

Oh, um, how am I supposed to get..

DIANNA:

Thank you. You inspire me.

SCHULTZ:

(to Nikki)

It tastes the same.

Everybody starts to leave.

DIANNA:

Amy! I’m not trying to punish you.

Does it feel a little like I am?

AMY:

No, no I appreciate..

DIANNA:

I know you want to branch out andcover more. And you do know I amlooking for a new executive editor,

don’t you?

AMY:

Yes I do know that. And I’m veryinterested. I’d love to be

considered. Especially because mydad’s house is not selling and mysister and I had to put him intoassisted living. You would think itwas the Waldorf it’s so expensive.

13.

DIANNA:

Is this your one woman show, rightnow, cause I ain’t got a ticket.

Just eviscerate the piece. I’mgiving you an assignment.

Donald rushes in.

DIANNA (CONT’D)

And Amy would you to teach this(Donald) about this (office).

Dianna uses her fingers to signal. Amy looks at Donald. He isexcited. Dianna exits.

DONALD:

So does she have a foreign accentor is she just awesome?

Amy gives him an annoyed look.

AMY:

Don’t talk to me for two weeks.

EXT. GORDON’S HOME - DAY

GORDON’S small house in the suburbs of Queens. Amy’s sisterKIM is carrying boxes and bags to the curb. Realtor sign onthe lawn. Kim and Amy walk toward the garage as they talk.

AMY (V.O.)

That’s my sister Kim. She’s cute,

right? Well back off, she’s totallymarried as f***. We’re moving our

dad out today. He needs 24 hourcare in his fifties, so he has to

live with all these elderly people.

KIM:

That stuff’s Goodwill, that stuff’s

ebay and this stuff up here is

trash.

AMY:

This stuff’s ebay?

KIM:

Yeah.

AMY:

I wanna go through this.

14.

KIM:

Don’t go through it, that’s stuffwe can make money off of.

AMY:

Why are they here?

TOM and ALLISTER play in the yard.

KIM:

They’re picking me up.

ALLISTER:

Mother look we got a croquet set.

KIM:

Great job, sweet pea.

AMY:

He calls you mother? That’s creepy.

KIM:

Yeah, it’s his choice.

AMY:

Let him call you stepmother. It’s

more accurate.

KIM:

I raised that child.

Allister runs in.

ALLISTER:

Mom I found a glove.

AMY:

Hey buddy, how you doin?

ALLISTER:

Good.

AMY:

What’re you studying in school?

15.

ALLISTER:

We’re learning about space and allthe celestial objects and you knowhow there are planets and solarsystems and sometimes there couldbe multiple universes but peopledon’t know how to describe that yetbut it’s a new theory and I’m soexcited to see if they figure it

out or not.

AMY:

Great. See ya round.

ALLISTER:

Ok.

Allister walks outside.

AMY:

Why’s he dressed like Colonel

Sanders?

KIM:

He got to dress himself and that’s

what he chose. That’s what the

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