Trailer Park Boys: Don't Legalize It Page #2

where in the f*** to grow the dope.

Should I grow it in the trailer park?

Lahey's gonna be f***ing with me,

I'll have cops all over my ass.

It just doesn't f***ing work.

Cops aren't going to f***

with me in the sub-division.

Lahey is definitely not going to

f*** with me in the sub-division.

This is all mine now.

I have all of this,

because my dad said, "Don't

f***ing work with Julian."

Thanks for the f***ing advice,

Dad. Wish you were here, bud.

Ricky did this. He

caused my stroke.

Happened the day he got out of jail,

when he sh*t himself back into this park.

Now I'm a prisoner, and he's free to

go wherever he wants, whenever he wants.

Fortunately he's growing

his dope somewhere else.

But when he shits, he

still shits in the park.

It is dirty f***ing tough.

I mean, I can't get a real

job. Can't get any job.

Employers see how many

times I've been to jail,

and they think it's a mistake

on the goddamn paperwork.

Then I have to say,

"No, no that's accurate,

I've been in there

that many times."

Here's your chicken and liquor.

It's $65, plus $10 for delivery.

You know, so now I've

just been slinging

chicken, and beer, and

cigarettes and liquor to people

for a $10 fee just to get by.

Oh Jesus, I almost

forgot your cigarettes.

Corey Hart! Ha! Ha!

It wasn't f***ing easy.

I got out of jail and I was just as

broke and f***ed up as everyone else.

So... I fell back on

bouncing at the Red Knight.

This skinny little prick was f***ing

around, got up on the bar, started dancing.

He was wasted, I was wasted.

I grabbed a hold of him, threw

him down, put him in a hold.

And I don't know what happened,

the guy f***ing sucker-punched me.

Knocked me out in

front of everybody.

I mean, even my doorman saw it.

That forced me to step

back and say to myself,

"Julian, are you a f***ing

bouncer, or are you a businessman?"

My business has been up and

running for two months now.

- Private.

- Good evening, Sergeant.

Go for it.

Shhh.

Come on, go, go, go.

- Nice job, buddy.

- Thanks, Julian.

Oh! Jesus Christ, Jacob!

Jacob, turn the piss off!

- F***!

- I'm really sorry, Jules.

Man, you're here almost every day,

someone's going to notice something.

This stuff is liquid

f***ing gold, okay?

These guys in Montreal want

the whole f***ing thing.

It's going to make you

and I a lot of money.

Julian's got the Lincoln!

- Hey, man.

- Drink?

Yeah, sure.

I got a little present for

you too, man, from the harvest.

- Here you go, bud.

- Right on. Thanks, buddy.

F***ing best I've ever grown.

- Looks good, man.

- Smooth as f***.

What the f***'s wrong with you?

Oh, look at Mr. Fancy.

In a move that has raised eyebrows

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