Tony Page #2

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- Sweet. Who's that?

Peck, this is Tony. Tony, Pecker.

- Hello.

- All right, mate?

Wanna do that thing for us?

Three for a score, is that all right?

Listen, I'll do it this time but next time it's a pony.

Sweet.

- That last gear was sh*t.

- You keep coming back for it, don't ya?

Listen, we only come to you,

we don't go nowhere else.

Good boy, well done.

Lovely, brother. Sweet. Come on, Tone.

What's that ugly f***ing monging git looking at?

Oh, f*** him, anyway.

- Come here, mate.

- No, no, he's all right. Whoa!

- He's all right, he's with me.

- Want to see her?

Like to see her? She's been bled, mate,

she's been f***ing bled.

Listen here.

What's wrong with those bleeders

who call themselves leaders,

Those sick, weak, perverted men and women,

And surely you and I shall always spot them,

I'll tell you why

For they are clothed with the spoils of war,

they're warmongers, paedophiles...

Hello?

Now f*** off,

you f***ing abandoned f***ing reprobates.

It's a poem. It's a poem, Tone.

Don't worry, mate, he's having a giggle with ya.

See ya later, Peck. Nice one, brother.

Make yourself at home.

It's the far room on the right.

F***ing hell, what's that smell, Tone?

You wanna open a couple of windows

or something.

F***ing hell. What a shithole this is, eh?

It's all right.

It's like an old people's gaff, like old dcor.

- Know what I mean?

- I'm not old.

I need some tin foil.

Give us that.

- Foil?

- Yeah, tin foil.

So, anyway, the Old Bill's

knocked on the door, yeah?

So Frankie's gone bosh, three storeys up,

landed on his legs,

shattered both his kneecaps.

He still tried to get up and run away, mate.

Black c*nt.

That's all the foil I've got.

That's blinding, brother.

That's all right, mate. Thanks.

Do you want a beer, then?

Yeah, go on, then. I'll have a beer.

We'll all have a beer.

Oh, mate...

I f***ing need a bit of this.

I'm clucking, boy.

- There's a beer there.

- Cheers, Tone.

F*** off, will you? Putting the beer in my face.

He's putting the beer over me, man.

What's the matter with ya?

Let's all just f***ing chill out.

Relax and have a bit of...

Ow! What you f***ing doing?

- Don't put feet on the table.

- Don't touch my f***ing foot.

- I broke that f***ing foot.

- Sorry.

Do you want some beans on toast?

- What you on about?

- Make some food.

No, I don't want nothing, mate. I'm all right.

Mack, do them up.

Shall I put a film on?

I've got no reception but plenty of action films:

Schwarzenegger,

Steven Seagal, Chuck Norris...

I've got Jean-Claude Van Damme, his first films.

I've got No Retreat, No Surrender...

I've got 2 as well. He's not in that.

How about 3? How about 4?

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