Tom Sawyer

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- Look, melons.

- What are you doing here?

- How much are they?

- Beat it!

What kind of bird is this?

Look, the steam boat.

Now!

Naturally.

F***, my head!

Chocolate.

Wait a minute!

Here.

I hate ships.

Joe! Check this out!

Here.

The cabinet!

Wait a minute!

- Kentucky!

- We had the show!

I can't believe it.

Let me, Tom!!

What is this?

Caviar.

Caviar?

That's what it says.

- Are you sure?

- Yes, that's what it says.

Fish eggs!

- But it's great box.

- Do you think that's worth something?

At least five cents.

- We'll never go on that ship again.

- Is there a way to get anything?

- You've got a wart.

- This is garbage.

It's a wart. I can handle that.

- I know how to get rid of it.

- I have to go.

- Where to?

- Business.

- We need only a dead cat.

- Tonight!

- Where were you?

- I was swimming.

- Did you bring the cards from the Bible?

- Yes, here.

- Where's yours, Ben?

- Here.

That's two. The price is three red.

I don't have three.

I put up the tooth. I pulled it out.

That's fine.

- But I want a real show.

- You can rely on it. Go on!

Hide!

Muff!

Muff Potter!

What? Yes.

- Nope.

- Get up!

Who? Me?

Yes, you!

Who are you?

Can't you see me?

You are in Hell.

Am I dead?

Can you smell that?

I just wanted to take a nap.

If you want forgiveness it will cost you a quarter.

I have no money.

You want to fry in Hell?

Wait! Wait!

I still have a nickel.

Show me!

Good. Lay it down on the floor!

Good. Lay it down!

Save your soul, Muff Potter!

- That was a show.

- Didn't I tell you?

- Where did you get that skeleton?

- I dug it up.

Get out, you dirty tramp!

- Potatoes!

- Thank you.

Mister Finn!

I'm not a mister. What's up, Muff?

- I'm dead

- You are... what?

Dead as a doornail.

Can you smell that?

How can you talk to me, then?

I guess you're dead, too.

I'm not dead! Definitely not.

It's me, Huck.

That's well said. Will you give me something to eat?

Since when are dead people are hungry?

He believed he was dead.

We'll get a nickel candy!

...and you'll do everything...

I command you to.

Oh and on!

Oh, meat!

- Tom?

- Hi, Amy.

- Didn't you want to show me something?

- What?

- Something great, you said.

- Did I say that?

Amy?

I'd like to see it, even if it's not all that great.

- Who loves you?

- We are getting married.

- What did you want to show her?

- You don't know it.

For three blue cards, I'll show you.

A nickel, three shots!

Try your luck, Gentlemen!

Thank you. One!

That's the look of failure!

Three! Very good, my friend.

A nickel, three shots! Try your luck!

A nickel!

This looks like it's just for me.

- Hey, push off!

- Why?

This is only for whites.

My money is white.

- Yes, but your skin is red.

- We don't accept Indians.

Take your money and disappear!

Man, he can throw!

I'd fall down dead, if she's not pretty.

- Who is it?

- The daughter of Judge Thatcher.

They just came from Constantinople.

Her name's Becky.

Becky.

Forget her. She's much too fine for us.

For you, maybe.

Tom?

Tom!

Tom!

Where has the villain gone this time?

Tom!

Tom!

Sid!

What are you doing in that tree?

It's pudding. Where did you get it?

From Tom.

- Tom gave you his dessert?

- If I paint the fence.

Tom!

- Shouldn't you paint the fence?

- Sid absolutely wanted to paint it.

Shame on you!

You let the others do your work

for you and claim that you did it.

- A lie always comes back at you.

- Why is it always me?

Come in!

Heavenly Father, we thank thee for our daily bread.

Open our hearts...

to Sid and his little nose...

because he simply doesn't get it. Amen.

You eat like a pig.

- Overeating weighs on the heart.

- You don't say?

- No, Luke, chapter 21, verse 34.

- Well said.

I have a yellow and three red cards toward

the Bible competition. How about you?

I bet you haven't learned a single psalm

- But do you want to hear one?

- Tell me!

F*** you, right where it stinks. Verse 1.

- That's enough!

- Sid started it.

- I saw you with Huck.

- Where?

Down by the river.

- Were you drinking rum with him?

- No.

- The guy isn't good for you.

- He's a great guy.

That's why he lives in a barrel and eats rats.

Stop it!

- Stop it!

- Sissy boy Sid!

- Quit right now! You stay right there!

- Just you wait!

Tom! Sid! Stop it!

Whiskey.

Give him something, Chuck, on my tab!

What is wrong with my money, Doc?

Nobody wants it. Why should I bother earning it?

If you need work, I'd have something for you.

What kind of work?

You know that Horst Williams

is dead. Dead and buried.

- I didn't know anything about it, Doc.

- No.

It's vital to find out how

he died, and therefore...

one needs an autopsy for that.

Dig him up from the grave for me!

Dig up a corpse?

That's a messy affair.

I will let this cost me a dollar.

- A dollar?

- You call that a cut?

So, tomorrow at midnight in the cemetery.

Want to earn a dollar?

I don't work anymore, Joe. I'm already dead.

"Do you see the light?

"You are in hell."

So they say.

In the circles of Hell...

Lucifer punishes the sin-laden without mercy.

Glutton, these are wolverines, like you, Sid.

They need to drink dirty water

and are eternally hungry.

The lazily rolling mill stones,

glowing chains on their necks.

Satan stabs liars with

a skewer, right there.

It hurts, doesn't it? And it never ends.

Excuse me?

Reverend, children.

I'd like you to welcome our new

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