There's Something About Mary Page #2

CAR HOOD KID #1

Yeah, I seen it. That girl over there, she

has it.

Car Hood Kid #1 points to a BUSTY GIRL leaning against another car

talking to her large BOYFRIEND.

CAR HOOD KID #2 (cont'd)

'Cept she doesn't call it a baseball. She

has another name for it...

CUT TO:

ON BUSTY GIRL - The Ear-Muff Guy marches up to her and her

boyfriend.

EAR-MUFF GUY

You seen my pecker?

GIRL:

What?!

EAR-MUFF GUY

You seen my pecker?

The Boyfriend grabs him by the collar.

BOYFRIEND:

You son-of-a-b*tch, I'll kick your ass!

The Boyfriend throws the Ear-Muff Guy to the ground and is about

to pummel him when Ted intervenes.

TED:

Take it easy, Smokey.

BOYFRIEND/SMOKEY

This f***ing pervert just came on to Nance!

TED:

All right, just be cool.

(under breath)

He looks like he's not all there, you know

what I mean?

A crowd starts to gather which only incites Smokey more.

BOYFRIEND/SMOKEY

Get the f*** out of my way, man!

Smokey tosses Ted out of the way and moves toward the Ear-Muff

Guy. Just then Mary shows up and steps between them.

MARY:

What's going on here?

She bends down and helps the Ear-Muff Guy off the ground.

MARY (cont'd)

Are you all right?

EAR-MUFF GUY

Mary, you seen my baseball?

MARY:

No, I haven't seen your baseball. Jeez,

Warren, you know you're not supposed to

leave the yard by yourself.

BOYFRIEND/SMOKEY

(to Mary)

You know him?

MARY:

He's my brother.

BOYFRIEND/SMOKEY

Oh.

(beat)

I didn't realize he was...you know...

At this, Smokey and his girlfriend reluctantly head toward the

school, along with most of the crowd.

Mary turns her attention in the direction Ted was thrown.

MARY:

You okay?

HER POV - Ted is sitting in a mud puddle. He stands and brushes

himself off.

TED:

Oh yeah. Fine.

MARY:

Thanks a lot, Ted.

CLOSE ON - Ted. He can't believe what he's just heard. As Mary

helps him up, she turns her attention to Warren.

Rate this script:5.0 / 1 vote