The Wedding Ringer Page #2
(HEART BEATING)
Mom and I
narrowed it down
to the silver tulle
tussie-mussie,
the 1915 Texan Tussie-Mussie.
Or we have our Trs Beau
with its goldia
floral etching,
enhanced in
a smoky-silver tone.
Does anyone else feel really
f***ing gay right now?
Ed! Let's go with the Trs Beau.
Trs Beau tussie-mussie
is fabulous.
Christ, somebody just shoot me.
I'll be outside.
EDMUNDO:
All right, team, canwe all gather around, please?
Okay. I have everything
I need for the bridesmaids,
but I am still missing
the groomsmen's information.
What? Honey, you told me you
spoke to all the groomsmen.
(STAMMERS) See,
I sent them an email,
but you know how guys are.
They just haven't
responded yet.
Babe, I know
you've been really busy,
but our wedding
is in 10 days.
I mean,
can't your best man
help you with
all of this?
Uh, but you see,
Bic's still in El Salvador.
Well, let's hope he's in LA next week.
(SNICKERS)
DOUG:
Oh, he will be.Mom.
He'll be there.
Okay, look, why don't I
just contact Mr. Rambis,
Mr. Garvey, Mr. Plunkett, Mr.
Carew,
Mr. Drysdale, Mr. Alzado, Mr.
Dickerson?
I can't breathe.
Mister, are you okay?
GRETCHEN:
Honey.(GASPS)
Honey!
Unless you are
planning to run,
you are backing yourself
into a very tight corner.
I'm not sure I understand
what you're implying.
Three out of seven of your
groomsmen are Hall of Famers.
She'll leave me, I know. You're
not gonna tell her, are you?
She's going to find out soon enough.
Oh, God.
Why didn't you say
something to me before?
I've been on a bullet train
ever since I proposed.
I haven't slept
in months.
I can't keep anything down. I
keep losing weight. I just...
I just want her
to be happy.
The truth
is always the best.
What if the truth
isn't an option?
Well...
There is one other thing.
Oh, babe!
I don't wanna lie
I'm gonna take
what you're giving
'Cause I know
you're willing
To take me all the way
You got me right here
Combustible
And I can't wait
to finally explode
The big, big bang
The reason I'm alive
Hey, hey! Lou,knock
that sh*t off, man.
(GROANS)
He had half his brain
removed two years ago.
LOU:
F*** off.Okay.
Hey, uh, do you know where
I can find the basement?
The big, big bang
The reason I'm alive
When all the stars collide
In this universe inside
The big, big bang
(DOOR BUZZING)
Oh, babe
May I help you?
Hi. Yeah.
Yeah, um, I'm looking
for Jimmy Callahan.
Who sent you? The Goose?
No. Um, Edmundo.
Ah.
Welcome to
The Best Man Inc.
It's a beautiful night
We're looking for
something dumb to do
( Hey, Dab)'
Just say I do
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"The Wedding Ringer" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 28 Mar. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/the_wedding_ringer_21622>.
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