The Sitter Page #2
Thanks.
What? Why?
The Pedullas' sitter
canceled at the last minute.
What?
Do I have sh*t on my face?
Come on. Don't tell me
you can't use the money.
Are you crazy?
No. I'm not Mary Poppins.
I'm not gonna be a babysitter.
I'm an adult man.
Okay? Babysitting sucks.
Adult men don't babysit things.
Oh, Noah, you're
wonderful with children!
You know, never mind.
Who am I kidding?
Finding a guy at my age is ridiculous.
What are you in
the mood for? Chinese?
Oh, come on.
Ding-dong!
Noah!
Mrs. Pedulla.
It's so good to see you!
Oh, my gosh.
Get over... Bring it in for a hug, babe.
What are we doing?
God, I haven't see you since
you were, like, 15.
Yeah. So Dr. Pedulla, he's still alive?
You two are still together?
Um...
Oh! That's my kind
of TV, right there.
Yeah, well, feel free to
watch anything you want.
Cool.
Yeah.
Hey, Slater?
Anyway, honey, this is Noah.
He's going to be babysitting tonight.
What happened to Nancy?
Nancy has a urinary
tract infection, okay?
Is Clayton coming over tonight?
No, Mom. His tarantula
died from parasites,
and now he's in mourning.
Well, you're in luck, Noah.
The two of them
together are just trouble.
Hey. That's not true.
Why do you say that?
Honey, lam not attacking you.
Okay? Calm down.
You know what?
I'll be right back. Yeah.
Okay? Excuse me
just one second.
Hello?
Hey, what are you watching?
Just watching some gymnastics.
Cool.
Hey, how old are you, man?
Thirteen.
Thirteen?
What am I doing here?
Why aren't you babysitting yourself?
I'm not a babysitter, okay?
Yeah, neither am I.
If you would just
man up and babysit,
I wouldn't have to be here tonight.
And my doctor,
he says that I can't
handle any kind
of responsibility,
or else I could just snap
at any moment.
Jesus Christ, man. Relax.
Okay. Sorry.
Slater, nice to meet you.
All right, should we go upstairs?
Bye, honey.
We're gonna have
some fun tonight, pal.
Roll back nice and easy
Keep your breath inside
so you don't get wheezy
Honey! What did Mommy tell you
about the mascara? Put it down.
You said I
could play dress-up.
Yeah, I said you
could play dress-up,
not make yourself
look like a hooker.
Look at you!
My daughter
Blithe is going through
this whole "celebutante" phase.
It's kind of unfortunate,
but it's a fad.
That's what they
do in the schools.
It'll pass. I don't know
where they come from.
Kids, right?
Yeah, kids.
Are you the babysitter?
Why, in fact, I am.
I'm Noah.
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"The Sitter" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 18 Apr. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/the_sitter_21322>.
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