The Ridiculous 6 Page #3

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and too little time.

Then I must get this $50,000 another way.

How? By stealing?

There is no honor in that.

Unless I steal from those

who have no honor.

Ooh... I like that.

But it is too dangerous.

I will send ten of our

strongest braves with you.

No.

The braves would be treated too cruelly

in the white man's world.

A lot of them can pass for pale face.

Raging Bear can actually do

a great impression of a white guy.

Hey, guys, let's play with our chest hair

and eat potato chips.

Wasn't that great?

Where does he come up with this stuff?

That's very good, Bear,

but I must walk this path alone.

My love...

I will get this money...

bring it to the singing windmill,

and be back in time for our wedding.

I won't let you go.

Those men are killers.

I was a coward once

and my mother paid the price.

That will not happen to my father.

Whoa!

Good morning.

Where in the hell did you come from?

I'm in a bit of a bind, boys.

I rode all the way out here

to pan for gold

and my horse up and died on me.

How'd he die?

Suicide.

Drowned himself.

Put his head in the stream

and just kept it there.

Saddest thing you ever seen.

It happens.

Powers that be don't like to admit it,

but it happens.

He looks like an honest white guy.

Hop on.

Much obliged.

Just drop me off

at the nearest town.

Ladies and gentlemen,

gather around.

Hear the wondrous effects

of Dr. Chubb's Vita Oil,

the miracle cure for 1001 ailments.

Put the pep back in your...

Who's this a**hole?

Well, now, look at this fella,

drinking from the horse trough.

Excuse me.

You there!

What you're doing is disgusting.

That water is for our filthy horses.

Water flows from the sky spirit

for all its children.

Isn't that right, cousin?

We don't cotton to that peyote-smoking

nonsense around these parts.

Do you hear me, "cousin"?

Okay, William, come on back.

Hey, amigo.

You planning on staying in town?

Might need a place

to lay my head for a bit.

Sorry about that ugly man

that insulted you.

He runs the bank, so he thinks

he's entitled to be mean to everyone.

There's a bank in this town?

Why? You wanna rob it?

I look like a bank robber to you, ma'am?

Funny, there's something about you that

reminds me of a certain bank robber.

His name was Frank Stockburn.

You know Frank Stockburn?

"Know"? Like, in the biblical sense?

No, ma'am.

You've met him before is what I'm asking.

Yes, I met him.

Then, 20 minutes later,

I knew him in the biblical sense

on that bed, right there.

Oh.

And, I knew him, in the biblical sense,

twice on this railing.

Uh-huh.

And then, while doing a handstand

on that dresser you're leaning against.

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