The Pirates! Band of Misfits Page #2
People to skewer.
Come on!
That is disgusting.
Wait a minute.
Captain, what is this?
- What?
- Captain?
That's nothing.
Could I possibly have that back?
- Hold on, hold on. Wait, wait.
- Thank you.
"Pirate of the Year"?
You're entering Pirate of the Year?
No, no, no, no, no.
- Yes.
- Again?
Yes!
Come on. Listen, did they change the rules?
I mean, I always thought they gave it
to the pirate with the most booty.
Do they now just give it to the guy
with the fattest parrot?
She is not fat. She's just big-boned.
She's fat, dude.
Yeah, go on. Go on, then, laugh.
Everyone laugh.
Ignore them, Captain. It's not worth it.
with your wallpaper, anyway.
You'll see, you'll see.
I will be Pirate of the Year.
Yes.
And then you'll be laughing on
the other side of your faces.
Yes.
And believe me, that is
Come on, lads.
Well...
All right, now listen up, you coves.
All right, now listen up, you coves.
'We'll show those swabs
a thing or two about pirating.
There's still time
to fill these chests with sparkling booty.
I can practically taste that trophy!
Trophy! Trophy! Trophy!
Captain! Sail off the port bow!
Let's get after her, Number Two.
Aye, aye, sir.
Clap on all sail!
Royals and topgallants!
Release those gallants!
Fire those long things that go bang.
Fire cannons four and six!
Eat cannonball, lubbers.
Here we go, lads! Look and learn.
Go get 'em, Pirate Captain!
Avast! I'm the Pirate Captain.
And I'm here for your gold.
Gold? This is a plague boat, old man.
I'd give my right arm for some gold.
Or my left.
Right, lads.
Minor hiccup, that last one.
This time,
it's payday!
I'm the Pirate Captain,
and I'm here for your gold.
Geography field trip.
I'm the Pirate Captain, and...
Naturists.
Pirate Captain.
Blah, blah, blah, blah, gold.
Ghost ship.
Sorry.
Captain, we've sighted another ship, sir.
That's nice.
Do you want to give the order to attack?
No, not really, Number Two.
No, I think I've...
Think I had enough of piracy.
I'm hanging up my cutlass.
Captain, no!
Yeah, I was thinking
I might go into baby clothes, actually.
What?
I hear there's a fortune to be made
in baby clothes because
babies grow so fast.
No, but you can't. I mean, the crew...
They'd... They'd be lost without you.
What was I thinking, Number Two?
Pirate of the Year?
Me?
Look at the trophy cabinet.
I mean, that is all I've got to show
for my entire career.
Pirate of the Year?
It's just commercialized nonsense.
Real piracy isn't about trophies.
It's about fighting up staircases backwards.
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"The Pirates! Band of Misfits" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 29 Mar. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/the_pirates!_band_of_misfits_21078>.
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