The Nice Guys Page #2

In other news, a police spokesman

says he has not ruled out foul play

in the death of adult

film star Misty Mountains,

whose car went off-road

in the early hours of last Tuesday.

And now back to America's

favourite family, The Waltons.

(TICKING)

(MAN SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY ON TV)

"Equanimity.

"The quality of being calm

and even-tempered."

He accepted her betrayal

with equanimity.

Jack, I'm f***ing your dad.

(SPITS)

What?

(MAN CONTINUES SPEAKING ON TV)

John Boy...

(TV FIZZLES)

Six, seven, eight...

One...

F***. (SIGHS)

(DOORBELL RINGS)

-HOLLAND:
Who is it?

-Messenger service.

Holland March home?

(GROANS)

What the f***?

Mr March, we're gonna play a game.

I think you have the wrong house.

It's called, "Shut up unless you're me."

(GROANING)

I love that game.

You're a private investigator?

Look, there's 20 bucks in there,

all right? Just take it.

No, I'm not here for that.

I told you, I'm a messenger.

You can afford

to live like this as a P.I.?

-What's the message?

-Oh, right, right.

(CLEARS THROAT)

Stop looking for Amelia, all right?

I'm not even looking for Amelia.

She's a person of interest, man.

Fine. I'm done. Put a fork in me.

Don't really put a fork in me.

Amelia's gonna be very happy

that you got the message so quickly.

It's gonna make her smile.

That's good.

Now, (CLEARS THROAT)

I got one more thing I need

to ask you before we're done here.

-You wanna know who hired me.

-Bingo. Yeah.

Now, we can do this the easy way

or we can do it the hard way.

-Glenn.

-What?

Lily Glenn. Two N's.

Old lady hired me

to find her niece on Tuesday.

You just gave up your client.

I made a discretionary revelation.

No. No, you just gave her up.

I asked you one

simple question. (EXCLAIMS)

You gave me all the information.

I thought that's what you wanted.

What?

(GROANING)

Now, I'm very sorry that

you didn't get the message.

Me, too. (SNIFFS) But I get it now.

(CLEARS THROAT) I get it. I dig it.

Sh*t! (GRUNTING)

What about now?

You get the message now?

-Yep.

-Are you sure?

Yeah, I'm cool.

All right. Give me your left arm.

Huh?

Your left arm.

Give me your left arm. This one.

-No!

-Yeah, come on.

No!

Get... No!

-Did you cut yourself?

-I'm dealing with an injury.

Right, look, when you're

talking to your doctor,

just tell him you have

a spiral fracture of the left radius.

No! No.

-Deep breath.

-No!

-(BONE CRACKS)

-(SHRIEKING)

Do you mind if I have an apple?

(GROANS)

All right, Mr March.

You have a good day, okay?

(GRUNTING)

-Hi.

-Hey.

-Want a Yoo-hoo?

-A Yoo-hoo? Are you kidding?

Oh, yeah.

You know, I haven't had one

of these in about 30 years.

Are you a friend of my dad's?

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