The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad! Page #3

Oh, this...

This is a rare Samurai pen,

a gift from Emperor Hirohito.

Unbreakable.

Impervious to everything but water.

- Its value is beyond estimation.

- That's fascinating.

But I'm sure you didn't pay this

visit for a lecture on fine art.

To what do I owe the honour?

I'm investigating the attempted

murder of a dock worker,

a man named Nordberg,

a police officer.

He is still alive, then?

He was shot six times.

Fortunately, the bullets missed

every vital organ.

- The salt water preserved him.

- So they...

So they got him

to the hospital in time?

He's in the intensive care ward

at Our Lady of the Worthless Miracle.

This certainly comes

as a shock to me.

As you know, I'm not the kind of man

who takes such things lightly.

There is no room in my organisation

for criminal activity.

Look out there - a vast

commercial development built by me.

Do you have any idea what was

out there just five years ago?

You bet you do. Orange groves!

Acres of them.

As far as the eye could see.

But now that land will generate

ten times the amount of profit.

Are you all right, Lieutenant?

Let me get you some Kleenex.

Has this officer -

What's his name? Nordberg -

been able to tell you anything?

Well, he hasn't been able

to tell us a thing so far,

but as soon as

he regains consciousness,

we'll see if he

can still play the guitar.

- Pardon?

- I've taken up a lot of your time.

I'd like to look

at your employment records

and speak to someone in Personnel.

Of course.

- Dominique, send in Miss Spencer.

- Yes, sir.

I am quite busy making arrangements

for the royal visit,

but I will have my assistant

provide you with anything you need.

You've been very co-operative.

I'll note that in my report.

My pleasure.

Miss Spencer! This is

Lieutenant Drebin from Police Squad.

Hello... Mr Drebin.

Hello.

Oh!

Her hair was the colour

of gold in old paintings.

She had a full set of curves

and the kind of legs

you'd like to suck on for a day.

She gave me a look

I could feel in my hip pocket.

Yep, this was starting

to get interesting.

- Nice beaver.

- Thank you.

- I just had it stuffed.

- Let me help you with that.

This should be

what you're looking for -

the shipping and employment records

for Pier 32.

Thank you.

I've heard police work is dangerous.

Yes, that's why I carry a big gun.

Couldn't it go off accidentally?

I used to have that problem.

What did you do about it?

I just think about baseball.

That's a honey of an ankle-bracelet

you have there.

Did it slip down there again?

Yes, well...

I'll quickly go through these

and get them back to you tomorrow.

Fine, but there's no rush.

I mean, whenever you're through.

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