The Man with Two Brains

Synopsis: Recently widowed Doctor Michael Hfuhruhurr, the world's greatest neurosurgeon, injures Dolores Benedict in a car accident. He operates on her and saves her life using a technique of his own invention: cranial screw-top brain entry. As Benedict recovers, Hfuhruhurr falls in love with her and they are soon married. However, Benedict is only interested in Hfuhruhurr's money and Hfuhruhurr still yearns for his previous wife. They travel to Vienna to attend a medical conference where Hfuhruhurr finally divorces Dolores, meets a mysterious Doctor Alfred Necessiter and becomes entangled in a series of murders committed by The Elevator Killer.
Director(s): Carl Reiner
Production: Warner Home Video
Rotten Tomatoes:
93 min

A beautiful woman gets hit

by a car and needs brain surgery.

The man who hits her is

the world's greatest brain surgeon...

...who operates and saves her life.

- Lf I save her life, Olsen. Lf.

- You wanted to see me, Dr. Brandon?

- Yes, Michael.

This operation that you're about

to perform, I feel, is ill-advised.

No surgeon should operate on

a patient that he's personally injured.

It'd make him emotionally involved.

Don't you think I'm aware of that?

There's one person I trust

to perform this operation: Beckerman.

Dr. Beckerman was murdered in Europe.

You know that.

Exactly. Not only is he dead,

he's 6000 miles away.

What is that?

It's a vagina.

I know what it is.

I mean, what are you doing?

- Shaving her.

- This is a brain operation.

I know.

Is that supposed to be a heart?

Yes, sir. Clive and I thought

that since it's Valentine's Day...

You don't have to

shave her anywhere.

We'll be using my Cranial Screwtop

method of entry.

- Fine. Yes, sir.

- I never wanna see that again.

I suppose if it were Christmas,

you'd hang ornaments on it.


Metzenbaum scissors.

- Ten-blade scalpel.

- Ten-blade.

Sponge stick.

Give me a little sweat

on my upper lip.

Remove sweat.

Cover her breasts. I'm a man,

flesh and blood.


Damn, the cats around here.

Cranial Screwtop.

- Now all we can do is wait.

- Yes.

Where am I?

In a hospital.

You've had an accident.

I hope I haven't caused any trouble.

- Oh, no.

- I'm so tired.

- Who are you?

- I'm your doctor.

Don't try to talk.

Doctor? You're wanted

in O.R. 6 in 5 minutes.

Thank you.

Continue the Dilantin IV.

What a skull.

Boy, would I like to jump

on those bones.


I can't help comparing her to you.

She has a behind so sexy

you'd like to eat lunch off it.

Rate this script:(5.00 / 1 vote)

George Gipe

George Gipe (February 3, 1933 in Baltimore, Maryland – September 6, 1986 in Glendale, California) was an American magazine writer, author and screenwriter. Gipe died at the age of 53 as the result of an allergic reaction to a bee sting. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018


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"The Man with Two Brains" STANDS4 LLC, 2020. Web. 5 Apr. 2020. <>.

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