The Luck of the Irish Page #2

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Doesn't matter where you're from.

You can be anything you want to be.

[ KATE ]:
Fresh ground pepper?

[ KYLE ]:
There it was again

the feeling that they were

hiding something from me.

At school the next day,

I tried to find out what it was.

If you're looking for sports trivia,

Try Gofindalife.com.

Actually, I'm looking for

information on my family.

You know, my heritage.

Man, there sure are a lot

of people named Johnson.

Yeah, 4 million pages.

Maybe you should narrow

that search down a little.

Uh, why don't you start

with your father, and trace your family

back that way?

Well, I tried that,

but I couldn't find him.

Did you look in Cleveland?

[ SIGHS ]

Here, move over, let me try.

Look, you don't have to help me.

I'm head of the Heritage Day

committee, remember?

It's my job to help the heritage-impaired.

It's not important to me anyway.

I mean, so what

if Im from Germany,

or England, or whatever?

Doesn't mean anything to me.

Then why were you on the computer?

OK, what about your mother's family?

Where are they from?

I don't know.

Well, half of your heritage

comes from her, you know.

Well, yeah, but...

I never really thought about

my mom's family.

Well, what was her last name

before she got married?

Don't tell me,

You don't even know

your mother's maiden name!

How are you ever gonna

get a credit card?

Look, if you really want to find out

about your family heritage,

you might try talking to your parents.

They are your family.

I couldn't tell Bonnie that I thought

my mom and dad were

hiding something from me.

That day, after school

it got weirder.

The first weird thing

was my dad's old

high school yearbook.

He wasn't in it.

At least, Bob Johnson wasn't in it.

Robert Smith.

Bob Smith.

[ KATE ]:
Kyle.

Oh, hi, Mom.

What are you doin'?

Nothing.

Um...I'm gonna go shoot some hoops.

OK.

- OK.

Don't be late for supper.

I'm making stir-fry.

Why would he change his name

from Smith to Johnson?

You know, I mean, if you're gonna

change your name, at least change it to

something interesting.

Or, you know what?

Maybe he didn't pick it.

Maybe it was the F.B.I. or something,

like they gave him a new identity.

No, man. you gotta be,

like, a hit man or something

before they'll let you do that.

Nah.

Man, how do you

make those shots?

You know what? Maybe they

were, like, these big radicals

in the sixties, you know?

And they had

to go underground?

Yeah, or you know what?

Maybe they're really aliens,

and they got stranded on Earth,

when their spaceship crashed.

You...just touched the rim!

Yeah, I did! Ha!

My dad measures me, like, every week

to see if I'm getting taller.

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