The Late Shift Page #2

IT'S ONE LOUSY TABLE,

$10,000.

THAT'S CHUMP CHANGE.

( man )

That's extortion, Helen.

WHAT? IT'S NOT EXTORTION,

IT'S CHARITY, FOR GOD'S SAKE.

IT'S FOR PEDIATRIC AIDS.

YOU SELFISH PRICK.

Don't flatter me.

SWEETIE.

Put me down for 2.

WHAT?

2 tables.

YOU ARE SUCH A MENSCH.

Helen, do you still love me?

( laughing )

YES, I STILL LOVE YOU.

SEE, THAT DIDN' HURT VERY BAD.

When are we gonna

have dinner, honey?

I... I GOTTA GO.

I GOTTA GO, JAY'S HERE. BYE.

( laughing )

HOW YOU DOIN'?

HERE'S YOUR TICKETS.

WHERE AM I GOING

THIS TIME?

COME,

I'LL WALK YOU TO THE CAR.

OK.

THAT'S MINE.

I GOT TO KNOW MY FUTURE.

I KNOW YOUR FUTURE,

FOLLOW ME.

YOU'RE PLAYING JOE LAFFS

IN GREEN BAY, FRIDAY.

THE N.B.C. AFFILIATE

IS W.L.U.K.

GOOD LUCK, HUH?

I'M GETTING YOU IN

JUST IN TIME TO DO THE NOON NEWS.

OH, YEAH, THAT'S GOOD,

I-I'M SURE THERE'S A LOT OF PEOPLE

WATCHIN' THE NOON NEWS

IN GREEN BAY.

THOSE LOCAL STATIONS ARE GONNA

GET YOU THE TONIGHT SHOW.

I WANT TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING.

LOOK AT THIS.

NOT ANOTHER:

GODDAMN MOTORCYCLE,

I DON'T HAVE THE TIME.

HELEN, HELEN, HOLD ON.

TAKE A SECOND.

LOOK AT THIS MOTORCYCLE.

"TO J.L.

CRANK IT ON UP AND RIDE OVER

TO C.B.S. FOREVER."

IT'S A RARE BIKE.

ANY IDEA WHAT THIS

COST THEM?

NO, I DON'T KNOW

WHAT IT COST,

BUT I KNOW WHAT IT MEANS.

HI.

HELLO.

TABLE FOR 2?

PLEASE.

ARE YOU SURE:

THIS IS THE PLACE

FOR A GOOD:

CORNED BEEF SANDWICH?

YEAH.

SHE WANTED DISCREET.

I DON'T THINK ANYBODY

FROM N.B.C. WILL BE DROP...

OH, JESUS.

WHAT?

ARNIE KLEINER FROM PARAMOUN JUST WALKED IN

WITH SOME OTHER GUY.

WILL THEY KNOW HELEN?

HERE SHE COMES.

YOU SAID WE'D HAVE

PRIVACY HERE.

I JUST SAW ARNIE KLEINER

IN THE CORNER:

DOWNING A THAI BEER.

OH, MY GOD,

HOWARD STRINGER.

( laughing )

RIGHT. A PLEASURE TO MEET YOU, HELEN.

ROD SAID WE'D JUST TALK

A LITTLE BUSINESS OVER LUNCH.

THIS LOOKS LIKE:

A LITTLE MORE THAN LUNCH.

OH, OF COURSE IT IS.

WE WOULDN'T WANT TO

WASTE YOUR VALUED TIME.

ALL RIGHT. NOW,

WE THINK THE WORLD OF JAY.

WE'VE NOTICED WHAT HE'S BEEN

DOING FILLING IN FOR CARSON,

AND WE THINK HE'S READY

TO BE A STAR, RIGHT NOW.

AND WE HAVE SOMETHING

NO ONE ELSE CAN OFFER HIM.

11:
30 WIDE OPEN.

HOLY SH*T.

A DEAL MEMO ALREADY?

YOU GUYS ARE SERIOUS.

YOU... YOU TAKE THIS,

I DON'T... I DON'T WANT TO HOLD ONTO THIS.

YOU CAN GIVE JAY THE DETAILS

WITHOUT THE PAPER

IF YOU PREFER.

THE SHOW OPENS IN SEPTEMBER.

HE'LL GET $6 MILLION

TO START.

HOW DOES THAT SOUND?

$6 MILLION.

YEAH, ALL RIGHT,

I'M IMPRESSED,

BUT, UH, WE MAY BE

RUSHING THIS A LITTLE BIT.

JAY'S A LOYAL PUPPY.

HE'S GOT A THING

FOR THE TONIGHT SHOW,

LIKE EVERY OTHER COMIC

IN AMERICA.

OF COURSE.

BUT ISN'T HE STILL

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