The Kid Page #2

- No way.

Watch your cholesterol, hot dog boy.

Let me have that for you.

Hey, I worked hard for that!

Amy, those hot dogs will kill you.

Besides, we're about to have

lobster in cream sauce.

I don't want lobster in cream sauce.

I want hot dog in mustard sauce.

Please stop biting your nails, Amy.

Nail. I only bite one.

Why do you care anyway?

I care because you work for me.

When you bite your nails,

you're advertising weakness.

Really? Advertising weakness

with one little nail?

- What's this advertise?

- Nice.

- Hi, Mike. Is he in?

- Waitin' for you.

Wait a minute.

Wait a minute.

Hello.

- Hello.

- I haven't seen you in a couple of days.

- How have you been?

- Fine. Now can we go in?

No. This is the bit where you ask me.

We're very late.

I don't have time to...

Go on. Give it a whirl.

Hi, Amy.

How are you doing?

Fine.

We're really late.

Hey, the cavalry is here!

Russ Duritz to the rescue!

Here to save my sorry behind.

Josh, look after him.

- Good luck.

- Yeah.

Hi. I'm Josh,

Mr Riley's assistant.

- If you need anything...

- I do.

I need you to go up in the bleachers and

find me a dozen 8- to 12-year-old kids.

Eight boys, four girls.

Five white, four Latino, three black.

- Have 'em back here in three minutes.

- Okay.

I need to use

your Hi-8 for this one.

So why is everybody

busting my chops?

And the way I see this thing...

it's just a little

misunderstanding.

Okay, Bob, let me see

if I can explain to you...

how other people

see this little thing.

You see, to Joe Baseball Fan out there,

you're the guy that promised...

you would give five percent

of each ticket sold this season...

to establishing a baseball camp

for inner-city kids.

You're also the guy that gave

pictures to the press of kids...

actually attending this camp

which, in fact, does not exist.

Yet. I was intending

to get around to it, uh, eventually.

- Ah.

- I am a very busy guy.

No, Bob, you're not a busy man.

See, what you are

is a "stoopid" man.

A very stupid guy

who only played Mr Charitable...

because you wanted to suck up

to city council...

so they'd build you

a brand new baseball park.

But guess what.

Bye-bye, ballpark.

Hello, jail.

- So what's your big plan?

- How do you feel about

chocolate cream pie?

Why? You gonna feed the kids cream pie

to get me out of this mess?

No. The kids are gonna feed you

cream pie and get you out of this mess.

- Huh?

- Bob...

prepare to be pied.

I deserve it!

More pie in the face!

Bob, the press

is gonna eat this up.

Amy, what do you think?

- Amy? Amy?

- You want to know what I think?

I think there's something

very creepy about all this.

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