The Jerk Theory Page #2

A fire?

Fire!.

We've got to warn everybody!.

I've heard about dogs like you.

You're going to be famous!.

You're going to get your picture taken,

and they'll put it in the paper!.

This is exciting!.

You saved my life!.

Come on, let's warn everybody!.

Fire!. It's a fire!. Fire!. There's a fire!.

Everybody!. Up!. Wake up!. It's a fire!.

It's a fire!.

This dog, he's saving everybody's life!.

He's unbelievable!. He's some dog!.

He's a lifesaver!.

That's what l'll call him, too!.

Ol' Lifesaver!. That will be your name!.

Folks!. False alarm. There's no fire.

Mister, don't call that dog "Lifesaver."

-No?

-Call him "Shithead."

Good. "Shithead."

It's exciting.

It's just exciting to have

this kind of life on the road.

A guy and his dog.

St. Louis?

No. Navin Johnson.

No, do you want a lift to St. Louis?

-Okay, thanks.

-Hop in.

This'll be fine right here.

Thank you.

-Where you going?

-To the bathroom.

-Got to have a key.

-Can l get one?

My key is for customers who buy gas.

I'm buying gas.

I don't see no car.

I just need enough for my lighter.

Look at this!.

And my wife wanted me to stay home.

Look what l would've missed.

A complete fill-up for a whole lighter?

-It's on that wall.

-Thank you.

-And don't walk away with it.

-I won't.

Pop-top.

Silver Bird, l'm talking to you!.

Listen, you want to be

president of Texaco Oil?

-Sure!.

-Then clean up the sink in there.

Then l'll be president of Texaco Oil?

Whatever happened

to working your way up?

Working for me 10 minutes, and already

he wants to be president. The nerve.

Get to work in there!.

But, sir, l don't work here.

Not even for $1 .10 an hour?

"Dear Folks, l got this greatjob

in a gas station.

"l don't want to say

how much l'm getting...

"...but let'sjust say it's a lot!

"l'm enclosing $2!"

That's a good boy!.

"lt's a lot of fun working,

and Mr. Hartounian is really nice.

"He's teaching me how to be impatient.

"Well, l've got to go now. What do you

think l do, write letters all day?"

-You actually sleep here?

-Yes. Is that okay?

Come with me.

I got a beautiful little place for you.

Put the light on.

You're going to like it here.

Like it? l love it!. This is fabulous!.

You got the toilet here!.

This must be the kitchen. No.

You know what l could do...

...is take this wall

and just turn it this way...

...so l've got a larger living space...

...plus it'll create a flow into

the main living area. It'll be incredible.

No, l'll just elevate this about six inches...

...create the illusion of two rooms,

and yet still have that flow.

Then l can take bookshelves

and put it here.

No, l'll put the books right over here.

That way l can be relaxing over here...

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