The Englishman Who Went Up a Hill But Came Down a Mountain Page #3

stretches are steeper than they look.

- Yeah.

- l hardly think that

your pedometer reading...

will be much use.

Uh, well, not much,

but, uh, nevertheless--

So, can you see either

of our checkpoints from here ?

Uh,

n-no.

But l can see

those two men again.

SngSng [ Faint Singing ]

Rather ominous. Reminds me

of surveying Abyssinia in `88.

- [ Men Chattering ]

- [ Morgan ] Come on, boys.

Any more bets ?

This may be your last chance.

[ Man ] 2,300.

2,300.

For Williams the Petroleum.

Good man, good man.

Right, Anson.

Oh, uh, well,

same as you,

l imagine.

Mmm, yes.

More or less.

Good.

The very men we need.

Mr. Garrad, sir.

Settle our bet.

How high is our mountain ?

l`m sorry.

l can`t say yet.

We`ve only just done

the first recce.

You must have some idea.

Well, nothing accurate

as yet, l`m afraid.

- Good night.

- Night.

- [ Men Murmuring ]

Uh, look.

l may be wrong, but after 25 years

of doing this sort of thing, l doubt it.

l would say about 930 feet.

Gentlemen.

- 930 ?

- 930 ?

[ Dog Barking ]

- [ Knocking ]

- Come in.

- Mr. Anson !

- Oh, Mr. Morgan.

Yes. Perhaps you can help.

Do you know, um, who those two gentlemen

down there in the street are ?

They`ve been

following us all day.

[ Morgan ] Thomas Twp

and Thomas Twp Too. Local farmers.

They`re not quite

with it-- touched.

- Oh.

- Stupid. Twp.

That`s Thomas Twp on the left

and his brother, Thomas Twp.

- Sorry ?

- Oh, he`s Thomas Twp Too.

- He is.

- Or is it the other way round ?

W-Well, whichever. Tha-That`s fine.

lt was just they were, um--

-We were beginning to get a bit worried.

-Oh, quite harmless.

Now l think

l can safely say...

l`m speaking on behalf of all

of my patrons-- villagers to a man--

when l say l feel--

we feel--

that your Mr. Garrad`s done a pretty

shoddy job measuring Ffynnon Garw,

which is, to any trained eye,

a mountain.

- Beg your pardon ?

- Oh. Accepted.

No, no, no, no. l mean-- Sorry.

l-l`m not quite following what you--

930 feet, man ?

l hope he doesn`t intend sticking to

this obviously euphonious measurement.

No, th-th-the thing is,

Mr. Morgan, we haven`t really

measured, um, your mountain yet.

We`ve merely made a preliminary

reconnoitre, which has yielded

a very approximate figure.

[ All ] Click, click,

click, click, click.

- All the way to the top.

- That`s it ?

- Yep.

- Well, no wonder they

bloody got it wrong.

[ Men Laughing ]

And then finally, um, we`ll make

measurements using... this.

Uh, b-but

to use this thing,

which we call

the transit,

we have to be able to clearly

view the summits of Newton

Beacon and Whitchurch Hill.

- But they`re not mountains.

- No, they`re not mountains,

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