The Dukes of Hazzard Page #2

What's new

in law enforcement, Enos?

- They make you lieutenant yet?

- Hell, you know that'll never happen.

Maybe one of these days you'll

wise up and come work for us.

We could use a man like you.

I don't know. I don't think it's a good

time to be in the moonshine business.

Moonshine business?

We ain't in the moonshining business.

But if someone were in the moonshining

business, why would it be a bad time?

Now, Luke, you know I can't say

anything. Boss Hogg'll tan my hide.

He spanks you?

Hey, Dil, what do you want?

We just ordered.

By the looks of this place,

I'll take two bottles of Pepto...

...and a shot of penicillin, right?

Jesus, mother of Mary.

Look away, man.

Trust me, look away.

Don't worry about it.

I won't hurt her.

There ain't nobody in this bar

concerned about you hurting her.

All right, all right.

Y'all ready to order?

You better be reading

my nametag, friend.

I am, I am. I noticed

your initials were double D.

- Oh, sweet Jesus.

- I'll give you one more chance.

You wanna order, or you wanna sit

around and make stupid jokes?

Ain't gotta get fussy.

We're having a good time.

I'll tell you what, I'll order.

We don't want no problems.

Let's see...

Do those legs come over easy?

Oh, my God.

- How about the special, sir?

- Dil Driscoll!

You stop bothering that nice girl

and pick on somebody your own size.

- Billy Prickett.

- Hey, it's Billy Prickett!

- Welcome home, boy.

- You old mule.

Hey.

Why don't you cool off, Dil?

- Come on, boy. Let's get out of here.

- My, my, my.

Holy hell, Luke. There he is, right there.

That's Billy Prickett.

Should I buy him a drink?

Maybe you should buy him

flowers and chocolates.

Give me a Miller.

Make it a Lwenbru.

How you doing?

Hey, Billy Prickett.

Welcome back to Hazzard.

See, boys, I told you all the

waitresses in this place was dog ugly.

- Man.

- I'm only fooling with you.

Fellas, this is Bo Duke.

Bo is looking to break my Hazzard Rally

record. What is it now, four in a row?

Yeah, well...

All streaks must come to an end, Bo.

I'm calling this one "the drive for five. "

- Well, I'm looking forward to the race.

- Hey, Dil!

This is the boy

who's trying to break my record.

Oh, really? I'm Dil Driscoll, crew chief.

- Bo-Bo, have a seat.

- Really?

So, Billy, what's it like

being in the circuit?

- Well...

- Hey, Billy, join me for a drink?

Oh, well, you sweet little thing.

Fellas, I'm awfully thirsty

all of a sudden.

Bo-Bo, may the best man win.

John, another round!

So, Bo, what's the story

on that little pistol over there?

Because she gave me a ride earlier.

Well, actually, she's my cousin.

Oh, really? You hitting that?

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