The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas Page #3

# Plain as it can be

# It's just a piddly, squattin'

old-time country place

# Nothin' too high-toned

# Just lots of goodwill

and maybe one small thrill

# Just lots of goodwill

and maybe one small thrill

# Just lots of goodwill

and maybe one small thrill

# But there's nothin' dirty goin' on

- # Nothin' dirty goin' on

- Yeah!

Well, everything was goin' along fine,

just like always,...

...until that famous college

football celebration.

Some think that's when

the trouble started.

For years, the winning seniors...

...of the Texas Aggie/Texas U

football game at Thanksgiving...

...were treated to a night out

at the Chicken Ranch...

...by their alumni association.

But, actually, the real trouble started

brewin' about three days before.

I can't tell you how thrilled we are

with your contribution.

- Here's your receipt.

- Thank you, Rita.

Those kids'll be so excited,

and the mayor too.

The council will probably

vote you another plaque.

Lord, I hope not.

I got a closet full of 'em now!

Hello, Dulcie Mae. You know Miss Mona.

Oh, yes, of course! We've met.

Mornin'.

- Good mornin'.

- Isn't this wonderful?

Miss Mona has just capped the goal

for the Little League fund campaign.

Oh, how nice!

Well, on behalf of my son and

his team-mates, I wanna thank you.

You tell 'em I'll be well repaid when

they take the championship next year.

- Goodbye, Rita.

- I'm sorry the sheriff wasn't here.

He went to Meritsville.

He'll be gone all afternoon.

Well, you tell him I said hi.

- Bye.

- Bye.

Bye.

- Hey, Miss Mona.

- How are you doin', Deputy Fred?

- It's nice to see you.

- Keepin' an eye on my place at night?

The sheriff's real particular

about security there.

Well, one of these nights,

you drop in.

My girls would love to show you

a little appreciation.

Shoot, Miss Mona!

You know I'm a married man.

Fred, you think the cows

don't appreciate the time off...

...when a bull goes over

to another pasture?

Miss Mona!

- See you later, Miss Mona.

- OK. Goodbye.

- Damn it!

- What's the matter?

- You're in bed already.

- So?

So I told you a hundred times - watching

you get undressed is the best part.

The best part?

Well, maybe not the best part,

but in the top two.

Now, would I wanna disappoint

my little honey?

Whoo!

- I'm glad I was late.

- Me too!

You just hold your horses.

I got a surprise for you.

I went by the post office. I picked up

a package from Frederick's of Hollywood.

Just a little something sexy

I thought you'd like.

Little? It don't look little to me.

Well, it ain't a trainin' bra,

but I believe I can fill it out.

- I don't think you got any problem there.

- I'll be back with more.

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