The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas

Synopsis: Founded in 1910 just outside of the city limits of Gilbert located in Lanville County, Texas, the Chicken Ranch has for generations been known as the best whorehouse in Texas for its wholesome fun, strict moral code and cleanliness, all perpetuated by its original owner, Miss Wulla Jean. Seven years ago, Miss Wulla Jean passed on, leaving the Chicken Ranch to her favorite working girl, Miss Mona Stangley, who wants to keep the same traditions of Miss Wulla Jean. The Chicken Ranch has always had the unofficial blessing of the local authorities, who see the ranch providing an important community service, one which most in local authority have used at one time or another in their life. In fact, Miss Mona and Lanville County Sheriff Ed Earl Dodd have been in a relationship for years, Ed Earl who is Miss Mona's protector, albeit one with a hot temper and good ol' boy attitude that doesn't exactly match the needs of his law upholding position. That blessing may change when television persona
Genre: Comedy, Musical
Director(s): Colin Higgins
Production: Universal Pictures
  Nominated for 1 Oscar. Another 2 nominations.
Rotten Tomatoes:
114 min

You wanted me to remind you

about your appointment.

That was right after I had lost

the fried chicken franchise,...

...while Ed Earl had been sheriff

ever since old Jack Roy Wallace retired.

Everybody liked Ed Earl,

especially Ed Earl.

Course, he sure did know his job,

and he was a big influence on me.

Taught me everything I know.

He used to like to run a quiet town...

...with plenty of time off for socialisin'

and coffee over at Dulcie Mae's Caf.

Oh, now and again there'd be a problem,

and we had some tough ones.

Like the time the mule

sat on Miss Modene's car.

He just buckled up his legs

and sat down.

She was really havin' a hissy fit,

but it didn't faze Ed Earl.

He just walked over to that jackass

and laid down the law.

You see, Ed Earl always

believed in talkin' first.

Cool reasonin', he used to tell me,

could solve any problem.

Course, he did have a bit of a temper.

Anyway, just about the time he became

sheriff, Miss Wulla Jean passed on.

She left the Chicken Ranch to her

favourite workin' girl, Mona Stangely,...

...who saw the little house

as a Texas institution...

...and aimed to keep it that way.

# It's just a little-bitty

pissant country place

# Ain't nothin' much to see

# No drinkin' allowed

# We get a nice quiet crowd

# Plain as it can be

# It's just a piddly, squattin'

old-time country place

# Ain't nothin' too high-toned

# Just lots of goodwill

# And maybe one small thrill

# But there's nothin' dirty goin' on

# Nothin' dirty goin' on

# We get simple farmers,

local businessmen

# Congress folks from Austin,

young boys lookin' for sin

# Now, we used to get

a lot of roughnecks

# When the oil boom was high

# But payday'd get a little rowdy

# Thank God the field run dry

# It's just a little-bitty

pissant country place

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Larry L. King

Larry L. King (January 1, 1929 –December 20, 2012) was an American playwright, journalist, and novelist, best remembered for his 1978 Tony Award-nominated play The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas, which became a long-running production on Broadway and was later turned into a feature film starring Burt Reynolds, Charles Durning and Dolly Parton. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018


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"The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas" STANDS4 LLC, 2020. Web. 12 Aug. 2020. <>.

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