The Battery

Go! Go! Go!

Hey. Hey.

A thousand bucks.

I won a thousand bucks.

Yeah?

Heads up.

A thousand bucks, man.

Did you keep that?

I saw you keep that.

That lottery ticket's about as useful

as your f***in' hair gel Mickey.

Hey man, let's have a catch.

- Nah. I don't feel like it.

- Aw, come on.

Let's work on that curveball, huh?

Yeah and what's a

curveball useful for?

Uh, it's fun man.

It's baseball. We love

baseball, remember?

Yeah.

Okay no uh...

no shorties, I'm not wearing a cup.

None of this 57-foot

slider bullshit.

You know, in Latin America, they

don't let kids throw curveballs.

They teach them the changeup.

It's a lot easier on the

shoulder, but just as effective.

Was that your changeup?

You don't have a changeup either.

You're a one pitch b*tch, Mickey.

'One Pitch B*tch Mickey!'

Hell of a pitch, though.

Hey Mick.

Wanna fish for a while?

What?

Do you wanna fish for a while?

No.

Okay.

Might be a nice trick to learn.

Think I could figure it out.

Oh you do?

You know, it's not so easy Mickey.

There's a subtlety to it.

A finesse.

Yeah, you're subtle.

You're Mr. Finesse.

You're about as subtle as

a f***ing sledgehammer.

Anyway, look.

Fish, fish, fish, more fish.

Point taken.

Why don't you start a fire.

What are they doing out here?

You said they wouldn't

come in the woods.

No, I never said that.

- Yes! You said that...

- What I said, Mickey...

was that there would be

less of them in the woods.

Same as there will be

less of them on the moon.

Relax.

It's done.

Why don't you go put some

coffee on or something?

Oh my God!

Stinks?

Ugh!

Oh!

Hey Benny, look,

there's a sun roof.

Yeah well it's a f***ing

rain roof right now!

Close the thing, Jesus Christ.

Well, it's better than the

sh*t that used to be on.

You remember that girl I was

seeing up in Pittsfield?

Ummm, no...

Hey.

Check this out.

Right?

Look at this.

It's huge!

We could lay some pillows

down, blankets...

it's like a bachelor pad.

Sure.

Alright, then.

Let's go steal some of your

dead girlfriend's blankets.

I know what you're thinking Mickey.

And the answer is no f***ing way.

What?

You wanna stay.

Just for a little while.

No f***in' way.

Why not?

Do I really have to

answer that question?

But we just go and go, man.

Where are we going?

We're not goin' anywhere.

Mickey, that's the point.

We're like sharks.

Sharks are the ultimate

survivor, Mickey.

They've been around four

hundred million f***ing years,

you know why?

'Cause they keep moving.

They stop, they die,

it's the same as us.

It's not the same.

That was a house, up in Pittsfield,

that we were stuck in.

For three f***in' months,

- Remember?

- I remember.

Your mother, your brother

- They were in a house.

- I know.

We ate dog food.

- I know, Benny!

- And then we ate the dog!

We ate the f***in' dog, Mickey!

I had to kill the dog so

we could eat the dog.

I'm not gonna have this discussion.

I'm not gonna trap myself

in a big dumb-ass stupid

f***in' house again!

No thank you.

No we came, we checked it

out, you're girl's not here.

I'm sorry about that.

But we got some cool sh*t!

And as of now we're not

completely surrounded

by f***ing monsters.

So I don't think we

should press our luck.

Can't we just stay...

Ahhhhhhhhh!

Ahhh!

Mickey.

Mickey.

Hey.

What?

Pile's hot.

Mickey!

Wanna throw me some?

Mick?

Jesus! What the f***, man?!

Don't do that sh*t!

Those things are gonna

get you killed, man.

And maybe me too.

Turn 'em down, will ya?

- Alright.

- I'm serious

I heard you, alright.

Okay.

Now...

- Here.

- Come pitch me some...

Check this out.

Come on, get out there.

Testing, testing,

What do you think the

range is on these things?

I don't know, five,

ten miles maybe.

Well, they work.

They do work.

Alright, you can come back in.

Nah, actually I think I'm

gonna go take a sh*t.

Annie, this is Orchard.

Come back.

This is Annie, go head.

Yeah, listen. I got an addition

to your shopping list here,

courtesy of Miss Carter.

Go head.

Well, apparently

she told Jason uh,

he could pick the movie this week,

on account of the birthday thing.

What do we do?

She told him,

"Any movie you want. "

What'd he pick?

"Tremors"

Say again?

"Tremors"

It's the giant killer worm movie

with uh... Kevin Bacon.

I'm familiar with "Tremors" over.

Well, she promised the

kid we'd find it.

Been on my ass all day about it,

like I got time for this sh*t.

What kind of a goddammed movie

is that to pick anyway?

Over.

Well if they got it,

I'll get it, Frank.

Yeah, well don't bust

your ass over it.

We got more pressing concerns.

Go head, man.

Hello?

Hello, over.

Annie.

Frank?

The Orchard.

Anyone, over.

Who is this?

Uh, hi. This is uh, Mickey.

I'm here with Ben.

Benjamin McBride. We're...

We're uh, ballplayers.

We were playing baseball

up in Pittsfield, when...

Well...

Anyway, we've been

walking forever, and...

We just found a car.

We're in Connecticut. Over.

You stay off this channel.

What?

Wait.

Wait, what? Hello.

Please, we're...

we'e just looking for

a place to stay.

We're really hard workers.

We can...

fish, and cook...

and I think that we could

help each other out, over.

We got hard workers, kid.

What we ain't got is room.

We got no vacancy.

You understand?

Now that's that.

And don't try to find us.

You're not welcome.

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