The Bad News Bears Page #3

white and maroon.

Uniforms?

Hey, Whitewood.

What's this crap about uniforms?

What do you mean crap?

I've been meaning to ask...

You're paying me to coach.

You told me I'd be coaching kids

just a couple of hours a day.

I've got a lot of pools to clean.

I can't be out looking for uniforms.

Will you be quiet

for a minute?

You've been hired

as a manager, right?

One of the responsibilities

of being a manager...

is to get a sponsor

and to get uniforms.

- You didn't tell me that.

- I'm telling you now.

It's easy. You go to different

businesses and talk to the guys.

They all like baseball.

How could you possibly

strike out Ted Williams?

I had a mother of a screwball.

He means Ted Williams

was a major leaguer.

You told us you never

got past the minors.

It was spring training, Vero Beach.

Struck him out a couple of times.

You're not supposed to have

open liquor in the car.

- It's against the law.

- So is murder, Engelberg.

Now put that back before

you get me into real trouble.

If you were so great, how come you

never made it to the major leagues?

Contract disputes.

- When are we gonna get uniforms?

- I'm working on it.

Ahmad, even Hank Aaron peels the

old eyelids before he takes a swing.

Maybe I should

try left-handed.

No. Not just yet.

When are we going

to get our uniforms?

I'm working on it.

The other kids got their uniforms.

When are we gonna get ours?

You worry about your hitting.

Let me worry about the uniforms.

- My hat fell in.

- Dummy.

Oh, God. You too?

- How's the vacuuming coming, Toby?

- Not enough suction.

Just move it back and forth.

It'll come.

When we're through,

can we go swimming?

Don't jump in, Engelberg.

You'll flood the valley.

How's it going, Ogilvie?

There's not enough pressure,

but I'm adjusting the intake valve.

- Got a hell of a future in pools.

- Where you been, you crud?

I've been out getting what

you creeps have been bitching for...

Uniforms.

Best pitch I ever taught her

was the curveball.

How could you teach a 9-year-old

girl to throw a curveball?

Not only a curveball, but the most

tantalizing knuckler...

you ever saw in your life.

This thing was

a thing of beauty.

It came to the plate

and disappeared.

It was like a ball

of melted ice cream.

- Here.

- Thank you, Luppus.

- Lupus.

- Lupus. Sorry.

That's superb.

Thank you very much.

Tell us about the time you

struck out Ted Williams again.

Ted Williams, 1947,

Vero Beach, Florida...

spring training,

around March 15th.

Score was tied nothing to nothing.

It was the top of the ninth.

No. It was the bottom

of the ninth.

Bases were loaded.

There was old Ted

coming up to the plate...

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