The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert: The Bus from Blooperville

9 min

That's right.

A bloody good little performer.

Twenty four hours a day,

seven days a week.

I thought we were getting

away from all this shit!

Two's company three's a party

Bernadette my sweet.

We're unplugging our curling

wands and going bush, Felicia.

Why would you possibly want to leave all this

glamour for a hike into the middle of nowhere?

- Do you really want to know?

- Desperately.

Well, ever since I was a lad,

I've had this dream.

A dream that I now, finally,

have a chance to fulfil.

- And that is?

- To travel to the centre of Australia

climb King's Canyon,

as a queen,

in a full length Gautier sequin,

heels and a tiara.

Great, that's just what

this country needs.

A cock in a frock on a rock.

Oh get back in your kennels,

both of you.

Now the first thing

we have to work out

is how the hell

we're going to get there.

What do you think?

When do we have to

return it to the school?

- We don't. We own it.

- What?

I met some nice swedish tourists

called Lars, Lars and Lars,

and coaxed it out of them

for ten thousand bucks.

- But we can't afford it.

- Well, that's right.

Mummy, maybe a trip

to the outback

would help me get over this

little phase I'm going through.

And you never know, I may meet

some lovely country girl.

I hereby christen this

budget Barbie camper

"Priscilla, Queen of the desert."

That's got to be the

understatement of the century.


We will go our way

We will leave someday

- Mum!

Your hand in my hands

We will make our plans

We are here today to see

a very bright woman

who will attempt to

cross the continent alone.

On behalf of all our sponsors...

This is what we'll do

Go West

Life is peaceful there

In the open air

Where the skies are blue


start your engines.

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Submitted on August 05, 2018


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"The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert: The Bus from Blooperville" STANDS4 LLC, 2020. Web. 11 Jul 2020. <>.

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