Teacher's Pet

Synopsis: Leonard is a 4th grader; his mother, Mrs. Mary Lou Helperman, is his teacher, and has been nominated for a teaching award. They plan a trip to Florida for the finals, but need to leave their dog, Spot, behind. Unknown to Mrs. Helperman, Spot has been masquerading as a boy, Scott, who is her star pupil. Spot wants nothing more than to be a real boy, and sees a way to this when mad scientist Ivan Krank appears on the Barry Anger show. Krank thinks he can turn animals into humans. Conveniently, his lab is right down the street from where the Helpermans are staying, so Spot, as Scott (and the rest of his family) convinces Mary Lou to take him along. Spot becomes a man, but discovers it's not everything he ever dreamed of after all.
Director(s): Timothy Björklund
Production: Buena Vista Pictures
  2 nominations.
 
IMDB:
5.8
Metacritic:
74
Rotten Tomatoes:
76%
PG
Year:
2004
73 min
$6,295,378
Website
710 Views


When you wish upon a star

Makes no difference

who you are

Anything

your heart desires

Will come to you

If your heart

is in your dream

No request

is too extreme

When you wish

Upon a star

As dreamers do

Boy, talk about

your lucky puppet.

I'd give anything

if only I could become...

a real live boy

like that Pinocchio.

Aah!

Is that what you wish for above

all other things, dear Spot?

Oh, yes, dear Blue Fairy.

Being a real live boy

is the most important thing...

in the whole

wide world to me.

Then close your eyes

very tightly, dear Spot...

and wish for it

with all your heart.

I wish I was a boy.

I wish I was a boy.

I wish I was a-

Ow, you're hurting me,

dear Blue Fairy.

I ain't no fairy!

And it's time to get up.

Sorry, Pretty Boy.

It's just that I was having

the most wonderful dream.

Him with the dream again.

It's not enough

you dress up like a boy...

and go to that

cockamamie school every day!

No. "I want to be a boy.

I want to be a boy. "

Well, wise up, pupchik!

I want to be a rooster

in a henhouse...

but I don't see it happenin'!

Although I'd be a darn good one,

wouldn't I, Mr. Jolly?

Ohhh... la.

It's a bit early in the day...

for hypothetical speculations,

but... you? A rooster?

It is to laugh.

Who asked you, tuna breath?

You're still in bed?!

Come on, get up.

You don't want to be late...

for the last day of school,

do you?

And ruin my perfect

attendance record?

I don't think so.

Come on, let's go!

- Pants?

- Check.

- Shirt?

- Check.

- Tail.

- Tucked.

- Eyebrows?

- Plucked!

- Ears in cap?

- Ooh, a table scrap.

- Chow?

- Demolished.

- Apple?

- Polished!

World, here I come! Ha!

Born on the wrong end

of the leash

I was a dreamer

And a little schemer

A simple mutt

livin' a dog's life

But the bell for school

would make me drool

Till I came up

with this clever ploy

Which is to say,

dressing like a boy

Now he thinks he can take

other pets a peg down

Hey, I'm a dog who's learned

to keep his leg down

I gotta be a boy

He's so over

just being Rover

Gotta be a boy

This teacher's pet

thinks that he's a boy

He da bomb.

- He's a regular whiz kid

- Yeah, but-

Hey, that's how it is, kid

Now that summer's here

You'll be a dog

like any other

Leonard, haven't you

always wanted a brother?

I want to have a dog

- Hey, I'm off the leash now

- He's eating quiche now

Gotta be a boy

A boy and nothing but a boy

Nothing but a boy

Don't you think

you're stretching?

Quit your kvetching

Gotta be a boy

Spot, you can fake it,

but you'll never be a boy

But soft,

could what he said be true?

Is this really just a phase

I'm going through?

I sure hope so.

Shall I go back

to serving man?

Eat wholesome dinners

from a can?

Who needs French

and scoring goals?

Come on,

let's bark and dig some holes

What am I, nuts?

Leonard, wake up

and smell the kibble!

I gotta be a boy

- Spot, sit and stay now

- What did you say now?

He's gotta be a boy

- I've got to be

- It's not to be

- I long to be

- You're wrong to be

- It's great to be

- Great trait to be

- We'd hate to be

- Can't wait to be

- My mate-to-be

- Too late to be

It's my fate to be

A boy

A dog

- A boy, a boy

- A dog, a dog

- A boy, boy, boy

- Dog, dog, dog, dog

- Boy

- Dog

Bo-o-o-oy

Boy!

Congratulations,

Scott Leadready ll...

on winning the fourth grade

perfect attendance medal!

Thank you, Mrs. Helperman.

It's just the thing...

to compliment my math medal,

history medal...

and science medal.

Not to mention my medal

for self-esteem. Ohh!

Well, it's been a gosh darned

jubilatious joy teaching you!

- And all of you.

- Uhh!

Oh, foo.

I promised myself

I wouldn't cry.

I'm just going to miss you...

all so much.

Mom!

I told you a million times...

no hugs at school!

Oh, sorry, doodlebug.

I mean... dude, don't bug me.

Anyhoo, what yummy,

fun plans...

does everyone have

for this summer?

I'm going to my Granny Smith's

Granny Smith apple farm.

We're skatin' 24/7.

I'm grounded for a week for

hacking into Buckingham Palace.

But after that,

I get to visit my uncle Ivan...

who does strange

and disgusting experiments...

on animals and people.

I mean, who knows?

Maybe next time

I see you guys...

I'll be able to breath through

my neck like an amphibian!

Aah!

You're so weird, Ian.

Wait'll you see me with gills!

Heh! Hottie!

Aah!

Ahh! This summer.

Yeah, I know what I'm doin'-

just playin'

with my best friend.

Hey! Aah!

Yeah, best friends forever.

Calm down, angel eyes.

Now, poppy can't make

his announcement...

with your sharp little talons

in his Adam's apple!

Now, students

of the, uh, um...

Fourth grade,

Principal Strickler.

But soon to be fifth grade!

That's why I'm glad

I'm a principal.

None of this messy

student/teacher involvement.

They grow, they leave-

good riddance.

But I suppose it is

just that sort of...

bushy-gushy loving

teacher stuff...

that leads

to this announcement. Hmph!

Mrs. Mary Lou Helperman,

you have been selected...

as a finalist for

the Teacher of the Year award!

Neato!

That's right,

it's the N.E.A.T.O.-

the National Excellent American

Teacher Organization award!

Way to go, Mom!

And that's not all,

Mary Lou Helperman!

As a finalist...

the Fala D. Roosevelt

Unified School District...

will be sending you

to compete...

in the final round

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Bill Steinkellner

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