Syrup Page #2
Sure, you're welcome!
I'm sorry, New Products doesn't
accept unsolicited calls.
Tell me, Beth, how do you suggest
that I contact my own sister?
- That's just absurd.
- Try her cell.
- Have a nice day, sir.
- [phone rings]
Addy. This is Beth.
Yeah, the ingredients
in Addison beverages
are suitable for a vegetarian.
[Alarm bell ringing]
Woman:
Should we reschedule?
Man:
No, I don't know.
[People chatting]
Man:
Not sure how longwe'll have to stay out here.
[Scat exhales]
- [clears throat]
- Woman:
All over my phone.Man:
I suppose we should stand over here.
You know how they first
marketed fire alarms?
- Hired arsonists.
- Yeah.
"Marketing 101
I hear 'em from my manicurist,
my Pilates instructor,
my girlfriend.
I don't need yours.
You don't need my what?
A drink idea.
Okay, I have to say it: bravo.
You've got the sex thing,
you've got the wealth thing,
- you've totally got the mystery thing.
- You think this is an image?
You're right.
Don't ruin the magic.
The insurance company only obligates
a four-minute mandatory evacuation
for all fire alarms,
which means you have 25 seconds
before Addy starts losing money.
What? Can't we set up
a meeting, something?
I have an idea that could make
your company millions of dollars
and you're giving me 30 seconds?
That's how long we have
to sell our customers.
It's called advertising.
Five seconds.
All right.
Okay okay!
8:
00 PM, Alain Ducasse.11:
00 AM, coffee.I don't do dinner.
12:
00, lunch!Abe & Arthur's.
Or I'm going to ZephCo.
Tampering with a fire alarm
is a federal offense.
Men categorize women
in one of four ways:
mothers, virgins, sluts and b*tches.
Of course, none of the above
is suitable for the modern
businesswoman.
But you can create your own image
by selecting pieces of each archetype
that work for you.
For example,
the sexual attractiveness...
of the slut.
The wisdom of the mother.
The integrity of the virgin.
The independence of the b*tch.
This leaves men confused
and unable to pigeon-hole you.
What they're forced to do instead is
take you seriously.
- Mr. Scat.
- Ms. Six.
As this is a business lunch,
a handshake is appropriate.
I completely agree. I always say
lunch lubricates business.
- Lubricates what?
- Nothing. I don't lubricate.
- Mr. Scat...
- Scat.
- This idea of yours, "F***"--
- Yeah, that's F-U-K-K.
That addresses my first concern.
Now, with regard to the target market,
I'm assuming you're after the young,
cynical image-conscious consumer?
- [Phone chimes]
- Like yourself.
Mr. Scat, don't confuse me
with a consumer. I don't buy anything.
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"Syrup" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 28 Mar. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/syrup_19273>.
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