Space Chimps Page #2

---

Well, you keep showboatin',

and you'll be halfway to the taxidermist.

No, no, you can't take him!

He belongs to me.

Official government business:

eminent domain, national security...

a lot of other scary black helicopter stuff

you don't wanna mess with.

Ooh. He's older than I expected.

Well, you ain't no spring chicken either.

- And you're lookin' for-

- Oh, he's so cute!

Yeah, I'm a hottie.

I am Dr. Smothers, and you are going

into space just like grandfather.

Space?

Wrong answer.

You got the wrong Ham, Doctor. Okay.

Bye, space lady who's attracted to me.

- Hey!

- Good to see ya. Take care.

- Don't let the door hit ya on the-

- Well, uh-

He seems very excited to go.

Kid, you're throwin' away

the only shot you got.

This is a chance to make good,

live up to your legacy.

Hey, I'm the star of my show, not just

the warm-up act for some human astronaut.

Your grandfather

wasn't some warm-up act.

He was a NASA astronaut.

Got his face on magazines,

newspapers, television.

- He even met the president.

- I met the chief of police once.

Ham!

He did somethin' to be proud of.

Had a dream and went for it.

- You got dreams?

- I'm living my dream.

Whoa!

Uh, Houston? We have a problem.

Thanks for supporting your government.

Under threat of prosecution!

I- I'm- I'm gonna

need that trailer back.

- Huh.

- Well, looks like we're gonna

need a new cannonball.

You like to travel?

- Here he comes.

- Stand proud.

I can't believe it. We'll be flying

with the grandson of the great Ham.

You sure they said "grandson"?

- Whoa! I know my rights.

I'm calling the A.S.P.C. A!

- Huh?

I demand to talk to my ringmaster!

Help! I've been kidnapped!

Oh, he's clearly excited

to be in a new environment.

Oh, God!

Good glass. Ow!

Commander Titan,

navigation and coordinates.

Ham. Don't and care.

Lieutenant Luna.

It's an honor, sir.

- Mmm-mmm-mmm.

- Yeah. Oh, my.

Hello, lady chimp.

Do not mind if I "dooble."

Luna means moon in Latin.

That's right, sir.

- What do ya know? Two lovers of language.

- Name's Comet.

Computers and electronics.

I look forward to serving with you.

Sorry, kid, but I gotta play Poughkeepsie

on Saturday. Let's go, Houston!

Sir, with all due respect,

you've been selected for a mission...

of historical significance

in the noble pursuit of-

Land of the free, home of the brave.

Yada, yada, yada.

Listen, the only mission I have

is to entertain. Watch and learn.

- Abracadabble.

- Oh, cool!

Oh, perfect. He's a joke.

Anyway, best of luck, break a leg,

blast off-Whatever it is you say.

But I gotta bounce.

What are those?

Rocket packs. We'll be demonstrating them

to the press Saturday morning.

Rate this script:3.4 / 29 votes