Shorts Page #3

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Doesn't matter who their dad is.

What matters is who you are,

who you wanna be.

And you live your life like that?

Of course. Ow.

Come on, Loogie, you dork.

We gotta get home.

We're gonna try to get the baby

to give us lottery numbers.

Good luck with

the whole two-minutes-to-live thing.

It shouldn't be this hard to make friends.

I'm smart. I'm funny.

Like funny, ha-ha. Not funny weird.

So, what's wrong with me?

What's wrong with you?

Oh, buddy, where do I begin?

Run, run, run. Chase, chase, chase.

Ah.

Get me a rock!

Get me a rock!

Where's my rock?

Run!

It's gonna be worse for you

tomorrow, freak.

Let's go!

Huh?

Make a wish.

Who said that?

Make a wish.

Must be hearing things.

Make a wish.

Make a wish.

Okay, okay.

I wish I had friends...

...as interesting and as unique as I am.

Friends.

Come on, guys. Get in there.

We sifted some flour.

We talk about clarified butter, because

people get concerned about butter.

You can make clarified butter at home.

Hi.

Why didn't you take the bus?

That's always our backup plan.

It's okay. I just felt like walking.

Sorry, son. I, uh, texted your mom to

pick you up, because my meeting ran late.

I texted your dad saying that I couldn't go,

so he should leave early and pick you up.

Your text messages must've gotten lost

in a sea of my text messages.

Same with yours. Mine. Whatever.

Noodles?

It's okay, I'll serve myself.

Oh. You having problems

with your Black Box too?

Yeah.

No.

Ugh! I just broke up with my boyfriend.

He thinks he's so mature, you know?

He's not. He's a child.

He is living with his parents

and isn't he, like, 23?

No.

What was that?

It's probably the ice maker...

...making ice?

I'll go check on it.

Humph.

Whoa.

Did you guys come

from a gourmet planet?

Thanks, guys.

Team leaders!

Progress report.

Uh, I've implemented some new procedurals

that should maximize our value potential.

Well, I have highlighted our asset

management and jump-started...

...our business paradigm.

One moment, please.

Sounds like a load to me.

Initiate termination procedure?

Mm.

Not yet.

I'll fire one of them

at the company costume ball.

That should be good

for company morale.

Very well, then.

Keep up the good work, you two.

We are gonna get fired.

Nice.

Very nice.

Time to clean your room, sport.

Well...

...someone's looking

for a raise in their allowance.

Do you guys also clean...

...teeth?

Toby. Where are my keys?

I know you're hiding them,

you little alien.

Maybe I do keep messing up...

...and maybe it is all my fault, but...

No, no. I broke up with you...

...so why are you calling me,

Mr. I'm-23-And-l-Still-Live-With-My-Mom?

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