Serial Mom Page #2

It's so nice to meet you.

Here's a little something I made.

Fruitcake. Thank you.

Have a seat.

Bon apptit.

Chip's off to a fine start this year.

He's focused, conscientious...

participates actively

in classroom discussions.

He's a good boy.

There is one big problem, though.

What is it?

His unhealthy obsession

with sick horror films.

Chip's assistant manager

at a video store.

That's no excuse

for a morbid imagination.

I caught him drawing this

in class last week.

- Is there a problem at home?

- Of course not!

Divorce? Alcoholic relative?

Tell me:
Did Chip torture animals

when he was young?

No, he did not!

We are a loving

and supportive family.

Well, you're doing

something wrong.

I'd recommend therapy

for your son.

Thank you for taking the time

to come to PTA.

Watch this.

Scotty, watch this.

It's a sheep's tongue.

This sh*t is sickening!

Come on, put on some p*ssy.

Look, d*ckhead.

Blood feast.

The "Citizen Kane"

of gore movies.

I don't know what it is about today,

but I feel great!

- Cookie?

- Excuse me, Mrs. Sutphin!

- Hi, Mom.

- Hi, Mrs. Sutphin.

Hi, guys.

- Look how fake that looks!

- Oh, you kids!

Here. Have a cookie

and run along home.

- But, Mom, the video's not over.

- Don't you "but Mom" me.

Mr. Stubbins seems to think

that these silly movies...

are interfering

with your schoolwork.

Oh, boy!

Mr. Stubbins sucks.

Man, that one made me puke!

It's supposed to make you puke.

You forgot something.

- Are we leaving?

- Yes, you are.

Bye, Birdie.

See ya, Scotty.

Now, Chip honey...

I know how hard it is

being a teenager.

I understand. I'm your mother,

and I love you.

Could we watch that scene again?

You know, the one where

he rips her heart out? Please?

Ladies and gentlemen,

the perfect meat loaf.

Looks good, Mom.

Nothing like a home-cooked meal,

honey.

Misty, I made you your favorite

sesame broccoli.

Carl says if I lose ten pounds

he'll take me...

to the University of Maryland

Memorial Day Beach Blast!

Honey, I think that's great

if you wanna lose weight...

but I think you should do it

for yourself...

not for some boy

you hardly even know.

Carl's a jerk!

He certainly drives like a jerk.

Carl makes me happy and that

threatens this family, doesn't it?

Doesn't threaten me, honey.

I'm happy.

I'm happy too.

We just want you to be happy.

I'm so happy I could sh*t.

You know how I hate

the brown word.

That's Rosemary.

Something must be wrong.

Turn on the news.

A teacher at your school

has been murdered!

- Murdered?

- Who?

A Mr. Stuber or Stubins.

Mr. Stubbins.

That's my math teacher!

Which channel?

It's on all of them.

Police claim the driver

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