School of Rock Page #2

Genre: Comedy
Year:
2003
9,831 Views


We've never been in a bind like this|before, so thank you so much.

So how's this gonna work?|Are you gonna pay me upfront?

I don't understand.

It'd be really great|if I could get paid in cash.

Oh, well, we don't do that.

When you cut my check, make it|payable to Dewey Finn, for tax reasons.

You can discuss all of that|with Candace at the end of the day.

When's the end of the day?

We commence at 8:15,|school lets out at 3.

You know what?

Do you think I could cut out a little|early today? I got some stuff I gotta do.

It's cool. I can stay.

Mr. Schneebly...

...this is considered the best|elementary school in the state,

and we maintain that by adhering|to a strict code of conduct,

faculty included.

Don't worry about me.|I'm a hard-ass.

If a kid gets out of line, I got|no problem smacking him.

No, no. We don't use|corporal punishment here.

OK, so just verbal abuse?

If you have any problems with|any students, send them to me.

- I will do the disciplining.|- Check.

Children.

Please take your seats.

I'd like to introduce|Miss Dunham's substitute.

This is Mr. Schneebly.

Why don't you write|your name on the board.

Yes, I will.

You know what?|Why don't you all just call me "Mr. S".

Mr. S has never taught here|at Horace Green,

so I want you all to be|on your best behavior.

So the curriculum|is on the desk.

- And do you have any questions?|- Yeah, when's lunch?

The children just had their lunch.

Is there anything else you need?

I'm a teacher.|All I need are minds for molding.

All right, then. Well, thanks again.|You saved the day.

OK, who's got food in here?

You're not gonna get in trouble.|I'm hungry.

You. What do you got?

That's what I'm talking about.

OK. Teach. Teach. Teach.

All right, look, here's the deal.

I've got a hangover.|Who knows what that means?

- Doesn't that mean you're drunk?|- No. It means I was drunk yesterday.

- It means you're an alcoholic.|- Wrong.

You wouldn't come to work|hung-over unless you were.

Dude, you got a disease.

- What's your name?|- Freddy Jones.

Freddy Jones, shut up.

Shut up.

The point is,|you all can just chill today.

We'll start on|this crapola tomorrow.

- Yes, Tinkerbell?|- Summer.

As class factotum, first I'd like to|just say, welcome to Horace Green.

- Thank you.|- Any questions about our schedule?

Because usually now|Miss Dunham teaches vocabulary,

then gives us a pop quiz, then|splits us up into reading groups.

- Track B is...|- OK, hey, hey, hey.

Miss "Dumbum"|ain't your teacher today, I am.

And I got a headache|and the runs.

So I say, time for recess.

But Mr. S, that poster charts|everyone's performance.

Rate this script:5.0 / 1 vote

Mike White

Michael Christopher "Mike" White is an American writer, actor and producer for television and film and the winner of the Independent Spirit John Cassavetes Award for Chuck & Buck. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "School of Rock" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 28 Mar. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/school_of_rock_17594>.

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