Robin Williams - Live on Broadway Page #2

Synopsis: The fourth HBO stand-up special by Robin Williams.
Director(s): Marty Callner
  Nominated for 5 Primetime Emmys. Another 1 win & 4 nominations.
 
IMDB:
8.5
TV-MA
Year:
2002
99 min
582 Views


know what's going on"!

"Let's just see what happens".

Flowers were like Anne Heche

going "I'm out, I'm in, I'm out..."

"I don't know where to go"!

George came back from Japan, he went

"I went to the Coyote Conference"

- No, it's Kyoto.

- That's a very good car.

George, walk away.

And they say there's no global warming,

but right now the

North Pole is a pool.

It is beyond global warming,

at this point it is cooking.

It's 105 in the middle of the country,

and people come up going,

"Is it hot enough for you"?

"No, I like sweat to be rolling down

the crack of my ass like Niagra".

"I like my old man

tities to lactate, my man".

You see people in shorts and you're

going "Please, don't wear those"!

"Oh please, don't put those on"!

If you go to South West Airline

they're going,

"Sorry, you're not fat,

you're horizontally challenged".

Big people at South West

Airlines have buy two seats.

The problem is that

they are not together.

And you have to put your

tits in the overhead rack.

People don't mind now.

We're working our way through.

All over the country

you've got weird things.

In Houston they got Enron field.

"We were gonna call it

We can't call it

"We're f***ed field"!

"Arthur Anderson put in the

chairs, they spin both ways".

And now Martha Stuart

may become somebody's b*tch.

No!

Say it ain't so!

I like to consider it more

like "severe companion".

If you only have one room, and I

like to call it my "private space",

use the light well. You have vertical

bars, don't use horizontal blinds.

Also, think of your ankle

bracelet as an accessory.

The first time she has lunch going

"You call this keesh"?

Shut up, b*tch!

You're inside now, you're mine!

All over things have been going good.

I've been to Memphis, to Graceland.

I never knew that Ray Charles

had a decorating license.

They're some severe...

They're colours there that

have never seen daylight.

I've been to Nashville, I've heard

people sing songs like

"Take your finger outta my ass,

cause I'm leaving you behind"!

Funny ass sh*t people do now.

I'm sweatin' like crazy up here.

It's HBO, cause it's live.

People playing baseball.

You've got a good seat.

Yankees are kicking

again, way to go!

You did a good job.

It came through.

Everybody's worried about people

playing baseball on steroids.

Here's one quick way you tell

on steroids, your balls shrink

and your head grows.

So if someone steps up to the plate

with a Mardi Gras head and

Raisinettes, "You're out"!

Poor Barry Bonds!

They won't pitch to him

and when they do it,

they're trying to kill him.

He's like Yasser Arafat

of baseball.

For Jerusalem I have

an interesting plan.

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Robin Williams

Robin McLaurin Williams was an American stand-up comedian and actor. Starting as a stand-up comedian in San Francisco and Los Angeles in the mid-1970s, he is credited with leading San Francisco's comedy renaissance. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "Robin Williams - Live on Broadway" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 28 Mar. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/robin_williams_-_live_on_broadway_17046>.

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