Robin Hood

---

You know, there's been a heap of legends

and tall tales about Robin Hood.

All different too.

Well, we folks of the animal kingdom

have our own version.

It's the story of what really happened

in Sherwood Forest.

Oh, incidentally,

I'm Allan-A-Dale, a minstrel.

That's an early-day folk singer.

And my job is to tell it like it is

or was or whatever.

Robin Hood and LittleJohn

walkin'through the forest

Laughin'back and forth

at what the other one has to say

Reminiscin'this and that

and havin'such a good time

Oo- de-lally, oo-de-lally

Golly, what a day

Never ever thinkin'there was danger

in the water they were drinkin'

They just guzzled it down

Never dreamin'

that a schemin'sheriff and his posse

Was a-watchin'them

and gatherin'around

Robin Hood and LittleJohn

runnin'through the forest

Jumpin'fences, dodgin'trees

and tryin'to get away

Contemplatin'nothin'but escape

and finally makin'it

Oo- de-lally, oo-de-lally

Golly, what a day

Oo- de-lally, oo-de-lally

Golly, what a day

You know somethin', Robin?

You're takin' too many chances.

Chances? You must be joking.

That was just a bit

of a lark, Little John.

Yeah? Take a look at your hat.

That's not a candle on a cake.

Hello. This one almost

had my name on it, didn't it?

They're getting better,

you know.

You've got to admit it.

They are getting better.

Uh, yeah. The next time that sheriff'll

probably have a rope around our necks.

Pretty hard to laugh

hangin' there, Rob.

Ha! The sheriff and his whole posse

couldn't lift you off the ground.

On guard!

Hey, watch it, Rob.

That's the only hat I've got.

Oh, come along.

You worry too much, old boy.

You know somethin', Robin,

I was just wonderin'?

Are we good guys or bad guys?

You know, I mean, uh...

Our robbin' the rich to feed the poor.

Rob? That's a naughty word.

We never rob.

We just sort of borrow a bit

from those who can afford it.

"Borrow"?

Huh. Boy, are we in debt.

That sounds like another collection day

for the poor, eh, Johnny boy?

Yeah. Sweet charity.

Taxes!

Taxes! Beautiful, lovely taxes!

S-Sire, you have

an absolute skill...

for encouraging

contributions from the poor.

To coin a phrase,

my dear counsellor:

"Rob the poor

to feed the rich."

Am I right?

Tell me. What is the next stop,

uh, Sir Hiss?

Uh, let me see, uh... Ooh!

Yes, the next stop

is Nottingham, sire.

Oh! The richest plum

of them all.

Notting... ham.

A perfect fit, sire.

Most becoming.

You look regal, dignified...

sincere, masterful,

noble, chival...

D-D-D-D-Don't overdo it, Hiss.

There.

That, I believe, does it.

This crown gives me

a feeling of power! Power!

Forgive me a cruel chuckle.

Mm. Power. Hmm.

And how well King Richard's crown

sits on your noble brow.

Doesn't it?

Uh, King Richard?

I've told you never

to mention my brother's name.

A-A mere slip of the forked tongue,

Your Majesty.

We're in this plot together,

if you don't mind my saying so.

And remember, it was your idea

I hypnotized him, and...

Ah-ah, I know.

And sent him off on that crazy crusade.

Much to the sorrow

of the Queen Mother.

Yeah. Mother.

Mother always did

like Richard best.

Your Highness, please don't do that,

if you don't mind my saying so.

You see,

you have a very loud thumb.

Hypnotism can rid you

of your psychosis-sis...

so...

easily.

No! None of that!

None of that.

Well, I was only

trying to help.

- I wonder. Silly serpent.

- "Silly serpent"?

Now, look here. One more...

One more hiss out of you...

Hiss... And you are walking

to Nottingham.

Snakes don't walk.

They slither.

Hmph. So there.

Now, what about that for luck?

It's only a circus.

A peanut operation.

Peanuts? Why, you dunce,

that's the royal coach.

- It's Prince John himself.

- The prince?

Wait a minute.

There's a law against robbin' royalty.

- I'll catch ya later.

- What?

And miss this chance

to perform before royalty?

Here we go again.

Oo-de-lally! Oo-de-lally!

Fortune-tellers!

Fortunes forecast.

Lucky charms.

Get the dope

with your horoscope.

Fortune-tellers!

How droll. Uh... Stop the coach.

- Sire. Sire. They may be bandits.

- Oh, poppycock.

Female bandits? What next?

Rubbish.

My dear ladies,

uh, you have my permission...

to kiss the royal hands,

whichever you like first.

Mmm! Oh!

How gracious and generous.

Sire. Sire.

Did you see what they...

Stop. Stop hissing in my ear.

Did ya see? Did ya see?

Hiss! Oh, you've

hissed your last hiss.

Suspicious snake.

Masterfully done,

Your Excellency.

Now close your eyes

and concentrate.

Close your eyes. Tight. Shut.

No peeking, sire.

From the mists of time...

come forth, spirits.

Yoo-hoo!

Okay, little fireflies.

Glow, babies. Glow.

We're waiting. Ah... Oh!

Look, sire. Look!

Ah! Incredible.

Floating spirits.

Naughty, naughty.

You mustn't touch, young man.

Oh, how dare you strike

the royal hand...

Shh. Shh. You'll break the spell.

Just gaze into the crystal ball.

Oo-de-lally. Oo-de-lall...

Oh! A face appears.

A crown is

on his noble brow.

Oo-de-lally.

A crown! How exciting!

His face is handsome...

regal, majestic, lovable.

A cuddly face.

"Handsome, regal...

majestic, lovable."

Yes, yes. "Cuddly."

Oh, that's me to a "T."

It really is, yes.

Now what?

I, uh... I see, um...

your illustrious name.

I know my name!

Get on with it!

Your name will go down, down...

down in history, of course.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes