Recovery

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You're nervous.

Well... I don't know

what to say.

She likes football players,

right?

Yeah.

Why don't you just tell her

you're trying out...

For the team next year?

I'm not.

God forgives the white lies.

Edward...

Don't give her a chance

to say "no."

You're a good catch.

You just find that confidence

deep inside you...

And all shall see it.

Buddy, you gotta lose the pin.

It's gonna make a bad first

impression.

I'll train you.

She's the one... go get her.

Welcome gift from the girl.

Dad!

He is not worth it.

Hey!

What the hell? Let go of me.

I don't even know you.

No, but we feel the same way

about that whore.

I caught my boyfriend mounting

her in the pool house...

An hour ago.

God... I'm-- I'm sorry.

I'm gonna go tell him

she's got three nipples.

And now we're relocating.

Okay... wait. Actually, I have a

better idea. Come with me.

Woo-hoo!

I'm Jesse, by the way.

Oh, Kim... I got to Ben Wilder

high.

Ah, I was wondering why

i hadn't seen you before.

Oh! What's up there?

Ahh. The good stuff.

Seeing as this is now my soon

to be ex-boyfriend's house...

I think I'm inclined to treat

myself to some spoils.

Don't you?

Mm-hm.

That's a little inflammatory,

don't you think?

Not as inflamed as he'll be.

She's had chlamydia twice.

Mm-hm.

Do you think I should delete it?

No! F*** him.

Yeah! F*** him!

Uh-oh! Stupid b*tch problems

go in room 102, ladies.

What the hell? What do you want,

Toby?

What do you want?

Dr. horvath's Percocet,

yoga Emily's dexedrine...

Or my dad's sublimaze?

Let's get out of here.

One minute.

So, boys, what do all

these make me feel?

The pills?

Yeah.

Uh...

The perco is gonna numb you and

then lift you. It's intense.

And then this one, uh...

Kinda is the same thing...

But it's an inactive kind

of numb.

So, you know, don't operate

any heavy machinery.

Okay.

Vroom-vroom.

Yeah... so, what about

the minocycline?

What's that gonna make me do?

Yeah, that one is--

I wouldn't take more than

one half of one pill there...

Because it hits you fast,

and it fills you with this--

numbness?

Yeah, it's weird, because when

Kim's mom gives it to the cat...

It doesn't seem to do sh*t.

Yeah. You know, there's nothing

sexier than a guy...

Who doesn't know what the f***

he's talking about.

You guys need to stop selling

animal drugs to teenagers, okay?

We're out of here.

Later, douche bag.

Nice work, man.

Oh, my god... that was brutal!

Whatever.

Brutal.

Screw all of them. I can't wait

to get the hell out of here.

Wait, do you graduate tomorrow,

too?

Yeah, 10:
00 am sharp.

Oh, my god, wow.

You know, I just want my last

night as a high schooler...

To be a good one,

you know what I mean?

And if that means me, this here

bottle, then so be it.

It sounds like you want

to wallow.

I--

do you trust me, Jessie?

Don't answer that.

This short skirt, high-heeled

combo is not going to waste.

Let's go dancing, you and me,

looking like this, single...

Now? No-- i-- this isn't exactly

club attire.

You're right, you're

overdressed. Take off the shawl.

Okay, yeah, you want me

to take it off?

Oh, yeah, oh, yeah.

I'll be like this...

In the club, dancing by myself,

little half-naked action.

Oh, that's good. Uh-huh.

Yeah, you like that?

Okay, all right, you know what?

Let's do it.

As long as I can go home

first and change.

I like you, Jessie.

We're gonna have so much fun.

We better. Wait, what's your

Twitter handle?

I will hashtag us

"two scorned girls".

Uh, I deleted mine actually.

There are like way too many

creeps on there.

Oh, god, don't I know.

I think I'm in too deep

to delete.

Although, I think it would do

more damage tonight...

If Kent got to see the picture

that I posted.

You're genius.

I know.

All right, let's get out

of here.

Okay, what club do you think

we should go to?

Um, oh, there's that place

downtown called hyperdrive.

Never has a long line...

And it doesn't look too trashy

or discriminating age-wise.

That's a plus... all right.

Who are you texting...

What?

While driving?

Who'd you just invite

to the club?

I know that mischievous look.

Okay, fine, uh, it's this guy

i met a while back.

He graduated last year.

He was super into me, but you

know, not in a creepy way.

Ooh, is he, um...

Is he a theater nerd?

No.

A quarterback?

No.

Your principal?

He's more of a bad boy.

Yeah, he's rough around

the edges... he's got tattoos.

I know.

Okay.

Hey! No, no, no, no!

Don't, don't, don't!

Hands on the wheel.

"I was just thinking about you,

too! See you soon, pretty girl".

He thinks I'm pretty.

Oh, my gosh, you are

a pretty girl, aren't you?

Why, yes, I am a pretty girl,

aren't I?

Don't you dare!

Kissy face! He's gone.

Agh! Not emoticons!

I used emojis!

I hate those!

Oh, my gosh.

Dude! This club looks ghetto

as hell.

Okay, listen,

I'm a prissy b*tch...

But I do not want to get

rejected my first try.

This club is a sure thing.

Yeah... yeah, no, you're right.

I mean, it's not like we're

going to Compton.

Yeah.

Shut up! Come on.

Hey, back so soon? We would

have saved you some dinner.

Yeah.

Hi... mom and dad, this is my

new friend, Kim.

Hi, Kim.

Hi.

Are you girls hungry?

Oh, no, no, no, no. We're about

to go to a movie, actually.

We were sick of meatheads

doing keg-stands.

Oh, your grad gift is upstairs,

sweetie.

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