Recep Ivedik

Recep vedik.

Tell me, why do you avoid

the alcohol test?

Plus, you got out of the car

and harrassed the officers.

Sir, I'm a young man.

That night when I saw...

...something white approaching

at waist level...

...and someone commanded

"Blow it. "...

Allright. Cut it out, you loofe.

Take your things and get lost.

Don't you ever show your

face again. Move it.

Yes, sir.

- Hi. Are you the safe

custody guy? - Yes.

The police chief sent me.

I'll take these and leave.

Mobile phone. Belt.

Window crank.

- What's this?

- These are marbles.

They have emotional value

for me.

- Uncle, please buy one.

- Whoa! Why do you scare...

- Why do you frighten me?

- Please, buy one.

Got no money.

Get lost.

- Please, buy one.

- Boy...

Hey! Dude!

Hey!

Hold it there.

Give it to me.

- I found it.

- How's that?

What are you gonna do with it?

You don't pay any rent and tax.

What are you going to do?

Piss off!

F*** off!

Dear viewers,

I wish you all a nice day...

...from the beaches

of Antalya.

The beaches are full with

beautiful Russians.

Salih! Put two beers

in the basket.

I'll take them

on the way back up.

I'll take them here.

Get inside, you drunkard.

Listen to me, woman.

Don't talk sh*t.

You know what happened last time

when I pulled the rope.

Don't piss me off.

It's just two beers.

What are neighbors for?

- Scum!

- You fart!

Redneck! Orangutan!

Antalya is swarming with Russians.

Well well well.

If they are human...

...then I swear I'm an animal.

We're with Mr Muhsin, the owner

of Antalya Joy Nashira Hotels.

Being the highest tax payer

this year, what's your secret?

Being record holder is

like an award.

I owe this success to being fair,

honest and righteous.

There are very important

moral values for me.

Being fair, loyal and most

important, being honest.

When you're honest, all doors

open up in front of you.

Well put! Bravo!

I swear, you and I

are birds of same feather.

I'll bring you this myself.

I'll do anything for you.

Bravo! Salih, fix me

some food for the road.

Hi. I thought you have some

car problems and I stopped.

- Am I right?

- Yes. We were driving.

Suddenly the engine stopped.

We don't know anything

about engines.

Could you take a look at it?

I have to ask some questions

to find the problem.

Where did it break down exactly?

How fast does it accelerate

from 0 to 100 kmls?

Are the rims aluminum

or steel?

Seats fabric,

or fabric and leather?

Does the car have

ABS, ESR EBS?

I should know to apply

an appropriate therapy.

Can you tell me all the

standard features?

What has that

got to do with anything?

Shaddup!

Shaddup!

If you're that knowledgeable,

why didn't you fix it...

...instead of fluttering here

like a dove?

Beat it! Buzz off!

Start the engine.

Get in and start the engine.

Step back! Step back!

I don't trust you at all.

You're sneaky.

You're sneaky.

Start the engine.

I am!

Come on, start.

Could the battery be dead?

Get back in and don't

piss me off, you brat.

It's the battery.

Don't panic. I have a battery.

I'll give you that one.

Start the engine now.

Don't keep the car in gear!

Why are you driving me nuts?

Back off!

Never keep the car in gear!

You don't ever know the value!

Allright, anyone can make mistakes.

I'm Ok.

It worked.

Oh, my sweety.

That electric look in your eyes

will get your head crushed.

Buzz off.

Of you go.

Have a nice trip, sweeties.

Farewell.

Clear!

God, damn it.

Tozkoparan Road Service.

How can I be of help.

- Hello, road service.

Yes, sir.

I gave my battery to

two ladies to help them out.

They left. And what luck,

now my car won't run.

If you have given your battery

the car won't run.

What do you mean

it won't run without battery?

Does this car not run on gas?

Is this an electric car?

- What a shitty car is this?

Sir, please listen.

Listen. Are you recording this

for customer satisfaction?

Then damn all the technical staff

who listen to this.

I'll knock your head in.

Chill out. What's up?

Hi. My car broke down.

Where are you guys heading for?

- We're off to Isparta.

- And I'm off to Antalya, dude.

- Let's off together.

- Hello, guys.

Yo twin jerks.

I'll rip your tongue out.

Laugh at your own asses.

Why do you laugh like a horse?

Why do you laugh?

What's wrong with you?

What's wrong with you?

Don't you have parents?

What's this filth?

It stinks like a stable,

it stinks like between the legs.

Did you eat sheep, nibble

on goats? What's this filth?

I'm traveling to Antalya

with four bacons.

This is absurd, outrageous!

Your asses are all

covered with moss!

Open a window!

It stinks like between the legs here!

Why on earth did I join you?

Why... Can I ask

why you're staring at me?

Why do you stare?

What's up?

Why do you stare?

Why do you stare?

Folks... I also like that guy...

...who walks on Taksim Square.

Drinks two beers and...

...walks around like me.

Teoman.

His lifestyle is just like mine.

I saw someone servicing your

mom... in the market.

You wouldn't sink

in the sea, you know.

- Why, am I the Titanic?

- No, you look like a cork.

Do you dig my sense of humor?

For example, that light there...

I watch Discovery Channel.

There's that pervert.

Looks around like that.

The skinny one, with bulging eyes

white ass...

Everyone looks the other way

and he goes like that...

Got it?

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