Pootie Tang Page #2
So, do you have any girlfriends
at school, Pootie?
Aw, Mama Di. There's a sine
tippi in a classi-ti.
She's a cole toni.
Don't you talk dirty
to your mama, boy.
Always got your head
in them girls.
You need to have
your head in the books.
Leave the ladies alone.
And that's the way it was.
Daddy Tang and his belt
was always there...
teaching Pootie the difference
between good and bad.
Now, when I say he was always there,
I mean he was always there.
Hey, Pootie, let's
steal some apples.
When Pootie was only six,
his mother died...
Leaving him
and his father alone.
- Pootie was very sad.
- I know, son.
But his father
was a comfort to him.
Don't slurp your soup
in here, boy.
Two weeks later,
another terrible tragedy.
His father was fatally injured
at the steel mill.
What the fu--
Gorilla! Gorilla!
It was incredible.
Only the third man to be mauled
by a gorilla at that steel mill.
On his deathbed, Daddy Tang
had Pootie make a solemn promise.
Pootie...
I know
I brought you up tough...
but that's
'cause I love you.
It's tough
out there, Pootie.
You got drugs,
crime, gorillas.
Yeah.
I ain't gonna be here much longer,
so I'm gonna give you this.
Pootie, that's my belt.
As long as you got
right on your side...
with just that belt.
I know
you love the ladies...
and Lord knows
the ladies love you.
Don't let the ladies
come between you and the belt.
Those were Daddy Tang's
last words.:
"Don't let the ladies
come between you and the belt."
But there was something
else about the ladies...
that Daddy Tang forgot
to tell little Pootie.
Pootie Tang
turned out just fine.
Daddy Tang
would have been proud.
Pootie had it all--
hit records, movies...
magazine covers, fancy cars...
famous friends, beautiful
custom-made clothes...
and ladies, ladies, ladies.
Through it all, I was right there
by his side. That's me. Trucky.
And that's my man,
Pootie Tang.
Big-time celebrity,
ass-kickin' crime fighter...
and role model
to the children.
Pootie Tang has a message...
for the children of America...
so you better
wapatah to the bammies 'cause:
Pootie says cigarettes and fast-food
burgers are bad like netatai.
Don't drink malt liquor 'cause you
don't need to 'cause you're okay.
Sa da tay. Also, eat
all your vegetables...
and don't bang the dillies.
That's Frank,
Dick Lecter's right-handman.
So what do we care?
We care because
he's making these.
People have been making PSAs
for years. Hasn't made a difference.
Eddie, hit me
with those figures.
Since the inception
of Pootie Tang's PSA campaign...
sales of Lecter burgers
are down 30%...
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"Pootie Tang" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 28 Mar. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/pootie_tang_16082>.
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