Out on a Limb

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MISS CLAYTON:
Okay,

find a seat. Sit down, please. My name is Miss Clayton,

and I'm your new teacher. And since today's

our first day together, I think we should get

to know one another. So I'm gonna ask each

of you to tell us about

your summer vacation. Who wants to start? What's your name? Priscilla Johnson. You want to tell us about

your vacation, Priscilla? I got the measles. Oh, the measles.

That's too bad. Was that at the beginning

of vacation or the end? The beginning. Well, good. Then you had

all of August to rest up. What did you do in August? I got the mumps. You didn't. I did.

But it was okay. It was a neat vacation

with lots of presents. And everyone

was very nice to me. Oh, good. Except Daddy got nervous

when he got the mumps. (LAUGHING) But aside from that,

it was great. Is that all? Isn't that enough? Sure. Yes. Thanks, Priscilla. And what's your name? Elliot Field. Go ahead, Elliot.

We're listening. I went to summer camp. Okay. What'd you do

at summer camp? We threw cottage cheese

at each other. (CHILDREN LAUGHING) And then what? Ketchup. (CHILDREN LAUGHING) And aside from having

food fights, did you

do anything interesting? No, but that

was interesting. Yes, it was.

Thank you, Elliot. And let's see.

What's your name? Marci Campbell. Tell us about

your vacation, Marci. Well, during my vacation,

my brother lost his job, my mom almost

lost her mind and my stepfather

was murdered

by his twin brother. What kind of story

is that, Marci? It's not a story.

It's the truth. It happened in Buzzsaw. That's a little

town up north. My stepfather

was the mayor. I don't remember

any story about a mayor being murdered

by his twin brother. Okay, Marci, go ahead.

Tell your story,

we're listening. It was a dark night. Actually, it was a dark

and stormy night. A big truck came to my

stepfather's lumberyard. A very big truck. And in the truck

was a killer. His name

was Matt Skearns and he was very tall

like my stepfather and very ugly

like my stepfather. And he couldn't see

without his glasses,

like my stepfather. But that was normal, because he was

his twin brother. Matt Skearns had come bak

to town to get his reven. He'd been in jail for 15 yeas

for a crime he didn't commit, so you can imagine

how mad he was. (SCREAMING) Matt had an accomplice,

Virgil, a man he'd met in prison. Virgil was mean too,

but not as mean as Mat. Yo, four eyes.

You're late, four eyes. Don't call me that. So, how are the boys

in the joint? They don't miss me

and they sure as hell

don't miss you. (SCOFFS) Now here's

the phone number. And the name is Van Der Haven.

Mayor Van Der Haven. Good luck.

I'll meet you

tomorrow night. MARCI: I couldn't sleep

because of the storm, so I was relaxing

and watching a funny

movie on TV when the phone rang. (PHONE RINGING) (BARKS) (PHONE CONTINUES RINGING) Hello? (CLEARS THROAT) Mayor Van Der Haven? Who's calling?

Who is this? Hiya, Petey.

(CHUCKLES) Ah, hold on. Matt, how nice

to hear from you

after all these years. I want $150,000,

tomorrow, at your lumberyard! $150,000? Okay, okay. You'll get your goddamn

money, you little sh*t! Just keep your end

of the bargain. If I ever see

or hear from you again, I'll personally

kill you! Understand? I'll kill you! (THUD) MARCI: That night I discovered

that my stepfather, who everybody thought was

so honest and so respectab, wasn't the man

he pretended to be. (THUNDER CLAPS) That night I discovered tht

my stepfather was a crimin. Wow. Are you watching too many

horror movies, Marci? No, why? Well, one thing's

for sure. You have

a very active imagination. This isn't imagination.

It's the truth. Are there

any comments? Yes? It may be too soon to judge,

but I have to say

I'm really not convinced. It's so overstated,

so melodramatic. I'm sorry, Julius,

I disagree. So far,

it works for me. It's the most outrageous

summer vacation I've

heard in years. Should I go on? ALL: Yeah! (CHUCKLES)

Go ahead, Marci. I needed help.

I needed it fast. Only one person

to turn to. My big brother, Bill. Book on Echo

Tech, please. A.R.V. put in an order

for 200,000 at 26. Tell 'em it's gonna

get done at 75

with or without 'em. All right.

Odds for a hundred. Damn, every time.

Evens for 200. Do you read minds? It's a question of

reorientation, Steve. I know what you're

gonna do before you know

what you're gonna do. Jerry Beck had a

heart attack last night. My God,

he's only 36. 34. No time

for condolences. You're taking over

Daisy Cellular deal. Background,

two days ago, Daisy's C.O.

Leonard Hathaway dropped dead. Controlling stocks slipped

into hands of Julie Holland,

niece, must sell. Jerry was to meet today. Decided to have

heart attack instead. Such poor judgment

will cost Jerry. You will take this meeting. How much me offer? 160 million ceiling. I want it bad.

Really bad. Watch out. Travis of

Travis, Jacoby and Travis

is doing the legal. The elder Travis? Yes, Count Dracula

himself. Big bonus if you win. Let's play poker. I got a figure in

the back of my mind. Let's see how close

you can get to it. A hundred million. If we auctioned it off,

it'll get done at 175. (SCOFFS) Maybe

five years ago. Not with a market

this unstable. Excuse me, Mr. Travis.

Telephone call for you. Excuse me. It's too bad we have

to go through all this. It's just gonna

get done at 140. How's that? Oh, Travis is gonna

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