Newness

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1

Morning.

- Hey.

- Hi.

There is a customer who

wants a consultation

at the register.

Okay, I'll be two seconds.

Also, you know how

today's my last day

before I go to med school.

Sh*t, I didn't realize.

Yeah.

I'm having this thing tonight

at chacha if you wanna come.

Ah, damn, I'd love to

but I can't tonight, I

got plans, I'm sorry.

But thank you for everything,

you've been awesome.

Yeah no, it's fine.

It's been great working for you.

You're gonna kill it.

Thank you.

Very good.

Little better.

It hurts some more?

You're doing so good.

Okay, you don't need me anymore.

Just go and have fun.

What's up?

Well she doesn't

have her insurance

so I don't know what to do.

Is it for you?

No, it's for my mom.

She's really sick and

it's very expensive,

I really need it.

Hey, I'll cover it

and then she can pay

next time or something.

Are you sure?

Have a good day.

- Thank you.

- No, thank you.

I just get on my phone

and I just start swiping.

I like black girls,

I like persian girls,

I like white girls,

I like Asian,

well I've never been to

the Asian world as you have

and sometimes--

A big ole racist over here.

I'm not racist.

Yeah, you are.

You have your

own thing too, man.

You love Asian girls, you know.

Bethany was clearly Japanese.

You wouldn't shut up about her.

I knew she was clearly Japanese,

but I married her

because I loved her

not because I was like,

oh I need a Japanese.

How many times did he say,

Bethany takowa.

Bethany takowa.

The whole time.

You like their name, you say it.

But she was Japanese,

that's what we're talking about.

She was half Japanese.

Yeah so.

That's his wife man, come on.

- My ex, ex wife.

- Ex wife,

so it shouldn't matter because--

Well yes, but we don't

have to talk about her

like that, I don't know.

Let's not talk about her.

And you're a lucky man

for having an Asian girl,

that's all it is.

Thank you, thank you.

I'm gonna go to the bathroom,

do you need anything?

I'm good.

- Alright.

- You?

Why'd you bring up Bethany?

Because we talking about f***ing

persians and blacks and latinas

and f***ing asians fit in that.

So does he have a job?

Does he work, does

he make money?

He says he's an instagram model.

An instagram model?

Let's just let that

hang there for a second.

- What is that?

- Instagram model,

that's not a job.

Show me his photos.

Oh my god, crazy abs.

You have an

appetite, you know that?

You have an appetite to.

I'm not dating

as many people as you are.

I'm not dating as many people,

I'm just trying to find

someone who can make me cum.

This is a girl's night.

- Crazy abs' texting.

- Girls?

Girl night?

- How're you guys doing?

- Hi, how are you?

Is everything okay?

Try to make sure it's

always good for you guys.

Are you sure you don't

need anything else?

Bye, love you, be safe.

My best friend

had met her boyfriend

at the time on the app

and suggested I try it.

Just kind of for fun basically,

and I didn't even realize this,

but when I moved

into the building

my best friend at the time

was sleeping with the

guy on the fifth floor,

so she would literally go out

and then come to my apartment

and I would fluff her hair

and then she would

go sleep with him

and come back.

No.

And then sleep

in the same, yeah,

they'd tell me all about it.

And so you're not a doctor?

- No.

- You're a pharma dude.

Yeah.

So what's the difference?

Well the doctor,

you know is a doctor.

Oh right.

I work in the pharmacy.

Right.

Hey.

What's up?

Oh sh*t.

Oh sh*t.

Oh god.

Do you want to go

down on me now?

We kinda just met.

Hey I'm gonna go shower.

You okay?

Yeah, yeah.

I took too many.

Took too many what?

Klonopin.

How many did you take?

I don't remember.

I'm gonna get you

a glass of water.

No, I'm good.

Okay I'll be right back.

Okay.

Let it out, let it out.

Hey!

- Hi.

- Hey.

Sorry.

How's it going?

- Good.

- Yeah?

I got a shot of Jameson.

Oh.

- Okay?

- Perfect, yeah.

Would it be better if

you go to my place or?

Oh yeah.

But do you want to

have a beer before?

Yeah, yeah yeah, of course.

Modelo?

- Yeah.

- That good?

Can we get two modelos?

- Yeah.

- Thank you.

How long you been on wings?

A while, I don't

know yeah, yeah.

How long have you been?

Like six months.

I go through phases though,

like sometimes I use it

and then other times I just.

I don't know if I'm a big fan.

Really, why?

I mean to be honest I feel like,

80% of the time I

feel like a dildo

attached to a warm body.

I do, that's the honest truth.

People look at me and

I'm like, that's it.

You're from Spain originally?

Yeah.

Where about?

From Barcelona.

I came here for school.

Oh yeah?

And then I like it

and then I stayed.

Yeah, nine years I've been here.

What were you studying?

I did history

and then I did two

bachelor degrees.

But not just partial

like, psychology.

Right.

And then evolutionary biology.

Wow.

- They're very different.

- That's a lot of school.

Yeah, it's a lot.

Tell me something

evolutionarily biological.

Most fascinating

biological fact.

Yeah one, maybe you know,

is that, you know that

the tip of the human penis,

it's shaped like a mushroom.

Well like, some penises

are shaped like.

Most, I think, yeah.

Most.

So that's just

literally because then

the penis can scoop out

another man's sperm

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